Probation Infestation

(A stranger and I are applying for a job as probation officers in a rural county with a fairly notorious drug problem. Because we both missed the previous exam, we have to take a makeup one in the office. While we wait by the elevator for the time to arrive, a young couple with signature grayed and rotted teeth show up.)

Meth-head Guy: “You two here for probation?”

Me: “Yeah. Up here, right?”

Fellow Applicant: “Uh-huh.”

Meth-head Girl: “What are you on for?”

Me: “Well, uh, the exam.”

Fellow Applicant: “Yeah, we’re gonna—”

Meth-head Girl: “Oh, you’re here to BE probation officers?”

Meth-head Guy: “Ah, heck, we can’t talk to you!”

(They moved away from us.)