Pour Me A Double Shot Of Stupid Juice

, , , , | Right | December 9, 2020

It’s about eight years ago. I’m eighteen and working at a bar in the town centre somewhere in the UK.

We’re based between two of the grimiest pubs and the clubs in there, so we get a lot of dodgy, rude, and drunk patrons on a regular basis.

One night, at around midnight, this group of guys comes in wearing suits, and I can immediately tell they’re pretty drunk and obnoxious. They come to the bar, which is about two or three deep — around twenty or thirty people waiting ahead of them — and they start loudly asking for service, even though there are people patiently waiting in front of them. My team and I just roll our eyes and get back to serving people.

I finally get round to serving them.

Drunk Guys: “Finally! Some f****** service! What took you so long?!”

I just ignore those comments and ask what they want, and they start talking amongst themselves like they didn’t have enough time to work this out while waiting.

The ringleader proclaims that they’re going big tonight so they want a bottle of Grey Goose vodka.

Me: “I can only serve you a maximum of a double in any one drink; if you want me to make it stronger, go for it.”

He ignores most of what I said.

Ringleader: “Didn’t you hear me? ONE BOTTLE OF GREY GOOSE!”

We can’t sell the bottles of spirits under any circumstances. I call the manager up in the back and explain the situation. He says exactly what I’ve already told the customer, so we agree that if I explain the policy one more time and he still demands a bottle, I’ll do it.

What the ringleader didn’t realise is that I have to put the whole bottle through as double drinks, so this bottle ended up costing him £170 before any mixers when it’s only £35 in the local supermarket.

He throws his hands up in the air.

Ringleader: “You’ve ripped me off! I’m not going to pay that! Why didn’t you say anything sooner?!”

Me: “I did.”

He just fobs me off and goes to walk out. Little does he know, I’ve already asked the bouncers to keep him in the building until he’s paid up.

His mates laugh at him as he goes white as a sheet, realising he’s just spent a lot of money. His friends give him a little bit of money to pay help up; the ringleader then spends the night sulking with his £170 bottle of £30 vodka.

Source: Reddit (Credit: WaterboardedApples, Original Story)

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