In Line And Out Of Line, Part 6

| Right | October 30, 2014

(I am around five and I am at the grocery store with my dad. We are waiting in line and it is long because only a few registers are open. When we are next to be rung up a business lady defiantly walks in front of me and my dad and proceeds to unload her cart.)

Me: “Hey, dad, that lady just budged us!”

(To this my dad replied loudly enough for everyone around us to hear:)

Dad: “Well, [My Name], it’s all right for her to do that because she is important. Far more important than we are. In fact, she probably works for the government and she has to cut in front of us because they need her to help save the world. So, don’t get angry that she walked in front of us like we didn’t exist because she’s way too important to the country to wait in line like a normal person. In fact, she probably doesn’t wait in line anywhere because lives could be lost if she doesn’t get her milk and eggs three minutes sooner.”

(At this point the cashier has stopped ring her items up and everyone around us was watching. The woman turned to us, a mixture of annoyed and embarrassed.)

Woman: “I, uh… You can go in front of me if you’d like…”

(My dad holds up his hand.)

Dad: “I would never, ma’am. Your time is far too important for us mere peasants to waste. You go off and keep protecting our country.”

(She was completely red as she finished her purchase and walked out quickly.)

 

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An Artistic Response

| Right | February 16, 2016

(I’m 21 but very short and petite for my age, so I’m used to customers assuming I’m young and inexperienced. I mostly ignore it. Because our job involves cutting fabric for each customer, we’re generally serving them for around five minutes. Most customers tend to strike up a conversation.)

Customer: “So, how long have you been working here?”

Me: “I just passed three years.”

Customer: “Really? I come in here a lot and I’ve never seen you before.”

Me: “Me too. Funny how that happens.”

(She gives me a glare. I decide to start playing along in case she gets angry.)

Me: “I’ve also been studying at university, so I’m not here as often as the other staff.”

Customer: “You’re at university?!”

Me: “Yes. I’ve just finished and will graduate next month.”

Customer: *condescendingly* “Did you enjoy your little arts degree, then?”

(I’m incredibly offended by this.)

Me: “I’ll actually be receiving a Bachelor of Commerce majoring in business information systems. It’s a very interesting field that involves using information technology to streamline business processes, with the end goal being that the added value will allow the business to remain competitive or gain an advantage. It’s the discipline where information technology meets information management in a business context.”

(She shut her trap after that.)

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Been Over-Demanding Of Late

| Working | January 16, 2015

(Every Saturday from eight until five I work in a small flower shop which has two stores, one in my hometown and one in a nearby town. I switch shops every week. This is two months before a party of a very good friend of mine, which will take place on a Friday night in a place two and a half hours away by car. Since I will have to be at work very early the next morning, I decide to ask if it’s okay to come in a little later the morning after the party.)

Me: “Hey, [Boss], is it okay for me to come in a little later on [date two months away]?”

Boss: “You’re working in [store in the other town] that day, right? It’s fine by me, but you’ll have to discuss that with your coworker for that day”

(So, the next Saturday, I ask my coworker the same question.)

Coworker: “Of course! I’ll put it on the calendar, so everyone knows, and it’ll be fine. There’s hardly any customers in the morning anyways, and I can deal with those on my own for two hours.”

(Happy, I text my friend I’ll be able to come over. The Tuesday before the party, however, I get a text message from my boss.)

Text: “Hello, [My Name], this calendar here says you’ll be coming in late this Saturday. I’ve never approved of this, so you’re just going to have to be here at eight am. It’s going to be a very busy day, and you better not be late.”

(Having everything ready for the party and not wanting to disappoint anyone, I decided to go anyway, and just drive back very early the next morning. When I got to work my boss was actually waiting for me to show up late, and, after seeing that I was there on time, left without a word. The kicker? I didn’t have a single customer until one pm!)

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No More Miss Cleo For You

, , , | Right | February 2, 2008

Me: “Thank you for calling guest relations. This is [My Name] speaking. How may I help you?”

Customer: “Yes. One of your hotels stole something from me and I would like you to return that item to me or I will sue you.”

Me: “We will certainly conduct an investigation. At which property was it left?”

Customer: “The [Hotel Chain].”

Me: “Ok… What city and state?”

Customer: “The [Hotel Chain]!”

Me: “I understand which brand name.. Can you please tell me the location of the property?”

Customer: “It’s on [Street].”

Me: “Ok, and what city and state is that in?”

Customer: “By the ocean.”

Me: “Yes, ma’am. Which city and state?”

Customer: “Florida. It’s not my job to tell you where it’s located.”

Me: “Well, as I’m sure you can appreciate, we have over 3,000 properties in the US alone. So I will need you tell me which city in Florida this is located…”

(Customer provides the name of city.)

Me: “Ok, great. And this is the [Hotel Chain] on [Street], correct? So what is missing?”

Customer: “I don’t know.”

Me: “You don’t know?”

Customer: “No. I visited my psychic this week, and she told me that one of the employees at that hotel, where I just came from this past weekend, stole something from me. The employee is female with dark hair and her name starts with an ‘M’.”

Me: “Ok… but can you tell me what you’re missing, please? That way I can have this documented and the hotel can investigate the situation.”

Customer: “I DON’T KNOW WHAT WAS STOLEN, BUT MY PSYCHIC DOES NOT LIE.”

Me: “Ma’am, I certainly apologize for any inconvenience experienced… but I’m sure you can appreciate that I would need to know what was taken to forward over to the hotel. Have you gone through your items?”

Customer: “Yes.”

Me: “And?”

Customer: “I can’t find anything. But your hotel better return my items or I will sue you!”

Me: “I’d love to help you. Please call us back when you have discovered what was missing. Thank you.”

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No Manners In Line Is Out Of Line, Part 2

| Right | August 9, 2013

(I am nine years old, and my family has moved to a new area that has a corner store two blocks from my new house. Our town is a bit of a tourist trap, and late one afternoon, I am waiting in line to pay for the items mum needs. A tourist, dressed in costly, dressy clothes rushes through the doors and shoves in front of me.)

Me: “Hey! The line ends back there. It’s rude to cut in!”

Tourist: “Shut up!”

(The tourist then addresses the cashier, a lady who knows me well enough to know that for a kid as shy as I am, trying to stand up for myself is a big thing.)

Tourist: “I need two packs of [cigarette brand], and directions to [ritziest local hotel].”

(The cashier looks at the tourist, silently, saying nothing at all for a long pause.)

Tourist: “Are you deaf or stupid? I want two packs of [cigarette brand] and directions to [hotel]!”

Cashier: “I was just giving you the chance to prove you have any manners at all. Looks like you don’t. This girl was next, and you pushed in. That’s rude.”

Tourist: “I don’t have time for—”

Cashier: “—and I don’t have time to deal with self-obsessed jerks. Get out.”

Tourist: “No, listen! I want two packs of—”

Cashier: “You aren’t getting anything. You have 30 seconds to get out of here before I call the cops.”

Tourist: “Are you serious? You can’t be f****** serious! I want two packs of—”

Cashier: “Get out!”

(The cashier reaches behind her, and grabs the phone from the counter. She starts dialing.)

Tourist: “Oh f*** it! I don’t want to buy anything in this stupid hick town anyway.”

(The tourist flounces towards the door. I speak loudly before she gets to the door.)

Me: “Isn’t it funny how we hicks actually know what good manners are for?”

(The woman turns red and storms out of the store.)

 

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