Me: “Thanks for calling [National Pizza Chain]. What can I get you?”

Caller: “Yeah, I want a large pepperoni pizza, no pepperoni, and six orders of fries.”

Me: *click*

(Five minutes later:)

Me: “Thanks for calling [National Pizza Chain]. How can I help you?”

Caller: “Yeah, I want a dozen cheeseburgers, hold the cheese, and four fries.”

Me: *click*

(Five minutes later:)

Me: “Thanks for calling [National Pizza Chain]. How can I help you?”

Caller: “Do you have gum?”

Me: “No, but I do have caller id, and will be giving your number to the police if you call here again.”

Caller: *click*

(I am 15 years old, and I work in my cousin’s burger van or cafe during the school breaks. Often I will be in the kiosk late at night when all the clubs close while my cousin is still working. One night a group of guys in their 30s comes up, slightly drunk, and ordered a bunch of food.)

Customer #1: “You having fun tonight?”

Me: “Uh, yeah. Sure.”

Customer #2: “Oh, god, leave her alone, dude!”

Me: *laughs nervously*

Customer #1: “Oh, come on… Hey, you see that sausage on the hotplate?”

Me: “Uh, yeah?”

Customer #1: “I could give you double the sausage on that hotplate if you come back with me.”

Me: “Oh, is that so?”

Customer #1: “Oh yeah, totally.”

(I laugh and let him carry on, his friends just laughing at him.)

Me: “So, I’m curious. Do you always talk to minors like that?”

Customer #1: “What?!”

Me: “Well, I’m 15.”

(Customer #1 runs off in a hurry without his order, red faced.)

Customer #2: “Well, he won’t live that down any time soon!”

(I’m working while taking an extra year at sixth form to finish one course. Due to my lack of classes I often end up working during typical school hours. My early birthday means I’m already 19 but I’m aware I look younger. A customer decides to make conversation with me.)

Customer: “So, why aren’t you at school?”

Me: “I don’t have any lessons today; I only take the one subject.”

Customer: *laughing like he’s caught me out* “So you ARE still at school! You can’t serve me; you’re under 18! Get me your manager!”

Me: “How about I do you one better, sir?”

(I happen to have my wallet on me so I hand him my ID and he looks it over. He throws it back to me, takes his drink, and sits at a table. My manager walks by and he gets his attention, explaining what had happened. My manager is very relaxed and simply shrugs at the man.)

Manager: “Sir, the challenge 21 policy doesn’t go both ways. She did nothing wrong. However I’m going to ask her, and if she felt you were offensive towards her I may just ban you from the premises.”

(The man wasn’t banned, though the threat of it did make him treat everyone a lot nicer.)

Boyfriend: “Hi, I would like two lemonades and a bag of kettle corn.”

Food Stand Attendant: “$17.50.”

(My boyfriend pays. While they are getting our lemonades ready, he runs to the restroom. I have been standing there holding the lemonades for a while at this point.)

Me: “Excuse me; can I please get my kettle corn?”

Food Stand Attendant: “That’ll be $6.”

Me: “Oh no, I am sorry; my boyfriend just paid for it. He’s in the restroom; we just never got it.”

Food Stand Attendant: “Whatever, that’ll be $6.”

Me: “But I just paid for it; you never gave it to me!”

Food Stand Attendant: “No you didn’t; you bought the lemonades. That was it.”

Me: “Two lemonades for $17.50?”

(At this point my boyfriend has returned, wondering what the hold up is. The food stand attendant gives him a flirty smile.)

Food Stand Attendant: “You forgot your kettle corn; so glad you came back!”

(As we are walking away, I realize she has written her phone number on the bag. That’s why she didn’t want to hand it to me.)

(I’m a fourteen-year-old girl, and my parents let me go to the barber alone for the first time. I get a barber I haven’t seen before.)

Me: “Don’t cut too short, though. I still want a ponytail.”

Barber: “You like ponytails?”

Me: “Yep, had one since I was a little. My parents both have ponytails as well.”

Barber: “Oh, so you have two mommies? That’s cool. My sister’s a lesbian, too.”

Me: “No, I have a dad and a mom.”

Barber: “That’s disgusting! Men shouldn’t have hair that long.”

Me: “Please keep your opinions to yourself.”

Barber: “Sure, but it’s disgusting anyway.”

Me: “But you’re a barber. What do you do with long-haired guys coming here?”

Barber: “Unless they’re getting it cut short, someone else is cutting their hair!”

(A few weeks later, my dad goes to get his hair cut.)

My Dad: “Heard you had some barber who didn’t like men with long hair?”

Different Barber: “Oh, him? He’s long gone… don’t worry. He insulted a long-haired man, and the manager fired him!”

This story is part of the Barber roundup! This is the last story in the roundup, but we have plenty of others you might enjoy!

10 Stories About People Who Didn’t Nail It At The Salon

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