Planting The Seeds Of Stupid

(I’m a manager for a window treatment/home décor shop. We are known for having a VERY generous return policy. One my newest associate answers the phone.)

Associate: “[My Name], I think I need help with this customer.”

Me: “Okay, what’s going on?”

Associate: “This woman is a decorator, and she bought some of the artificial topiaries for her client a while back. She wants to know if she can return them.”

Me: “That should be fine. What’s the trouble?”

Associate: “Her customer watered them.”

Me: “…”

(I got on the phone and politely explained to the customer that while we are pretty lenient with returns, this was one time I would have to say ‘no.’ Fortunately she was very understanding. Her client told her that the topiaries ‘were drying out, and looked like they needed water.’ He even claimed that they started sprouting new plants afterwards!)