Pizza Delivery Goes Sideways

, , , , | Working | April 16, 2020

(I fully admit I can be a Customer from H***, especially when hungry. Add mouth surgery on top of it and being unable to eat for a week due to the pain, and I am a walking crazy person. In this case, though, I am not trying to be mean. I am just trying to help a poor hapless fool who can’t follow basic instructions and is being difficult at every turn. As an important aside, I am female and I live in a townhouse in a complex full of other townhouses and four parking lots so there is no unit number — just my unique address belonging to me alone, which I used on the order. To account for some confusion, I usually give the car parked out front in the delivery notes, as well as a brief description of my unit location. Up to this point, in the five and a half years I have been living here, I have only had one other delivery driver ever have a problem finding me the first week I moved in, and I wised up. This part of the conversation takes place via text.)

Delivery Driver: *texts* “Hi, this is [Delivery Driver]. I am in the lot.”

Me: “Which one?”

Delivery Driver: “The parking lot.”

Me: “Which one? There are four, lol”

Delivery Driver: “West.”

Me: *thinking* “Great! That narrows it down!”

(The parking lots are as follows: Southeast, Southwest, Northeast, and Northwest. I am in the Southeast, which was mentioned on the delivery.)

Me: “I am in [Address]; it is on the Southeast Side.”

Driver: “There are no unit numbers on the address.”

Me: *getting a little annoyed* “That is because there is no unit number. It is a townhouse.”

(He calls and reiterates there is no unit number on the townhouse. I tell him it is the first building on the Southeast lot, but he is still insistent that I gave him the wrong address as I am literally walking outside to find this clown who, for whatever reason, is actually on the Northside. I reply, rather annoyed at this point with no food in sight and no way of finding him:)

Me: “This is a townhouse. Not an apartment. There is no unit number. Wh–”

(I begin to ask where he is when he interrupts.)

Driver: *snarkily like he is speaking to a child* “Same difference.”

Me: “No, not really.”

Driver: “I don’t like your attitude. I am just going to cancel the order.”

(Translation: “I don’t like that a woman is correcting me and I am embarrassed that I can’t follow directions.”)

Me: “Please don’t. That would be a waste of both our time. I will have to reorder anyway.”

Driver: “Too late. I am doing it. I am ending this call.” *maturely hangs up*

(For the record, I had to call to cancel the order — since that jerk stole my food AND his tip — and reorder my food. Funny how the next driver had absolutely no issue finding me with directions I gave: the exact same one, to boot!)

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