Piss People Off And This Is What Happens

My dad is an a**hole driver — cutting people off, deliberately driving to try to irritate other drivers, all of that. All of us have tried to get him to stop, but he always insists that he is just responding to what other drivers are doing.

However, there was a turning point when I was fifteen that shifted his behavior, at least somewhat.

It was a typical day. We were driving home from visiting family, and Dad was up to his typical antics, acting like he was driving in the Daytona 500 and needed to fight for every inch so he could be ahead of all the other cars.

He had just cut into a new lane, cutting off the car ahead of us that had signaled that they wanted to get over, and as we pulled up parallel to them, he stuck his hand out his open window to flip them off.

In response, a cup flew back through his window and splattered liquid all over him.

The liquid in question? Urine.

I have no idea how or why that car had a cup full of urine on hand. Maybe the kids I’d spotted in the backseat had to go and couldn’t hold it in time for them to find a restroom.

Whatever the case, it splashed all over my dad. He took one whiff, gagged, and promptly threw up all over himself and the steering wheel. We pulled into the next available parking lot, Dad gagging and puking, and he stumbled out of the car the moment he got it slowed down enough. Mom ended up having to scramble over into the seat to actually bring it to a stop and turn it off.

Mom sent me to a convenience store down the street for cleaning supplies, but we eventually managed to clean up enough for Dad to resume driving us home.

For the next two or three months after that, Dad was a picture-perfect driver, not even sticking a toe out of line. Even when he did end up backsliding, he was never quite as bad as he’d been before “the incident”.