Pimento No No

(This takes place at an Italian restaurant. I almost never eat at Italian restaurants as I have a LOT of food allergies, including tomatoes and peppers.)

Me: “Does the chicken and vegetable soup have peppers in it?”

Waitress: “No. There shouldn’t be. I’ll check with the chef just in case.” *leaves and comes back* “No, there aren’t any peppers. You’re good.”

Me: “Perfect. Then I’ll have that.”

(The waitress comes back with the soup and puts it in front of me. At this point, I check my soup. I always check everything, just in case, and this turns out to have something red in it… a pepper.)

Me: “Excuse me. This has peppers in it.”

Waitress: “Oh, no! Let me see that. I’ll go ask the chef immediately!” *returns five minutes later* “You can eat it. That wasn’t a pepper. It was a pimento. It’s the thing from inside the olive, you know. So you can totally have it!”

Me: “The other half of the word is ‘pepper.’”