Physically Checked In, Mentally Checked Out

(I’m almost done checking in a hotel guest and am giving them the customary closing spiel.)

Me: “We have a full hot buffet breakfast from 6-10 AM, which is included in your room rate. There is wireless internet throughout, with no password needed to log on. The pool, hot-tub, and gym are at the end of the hallway on the first floor here, and is open from 8 AM to 10 PM. Please let me know if you have any questions. Someone is at the desk 24/7.”

Guest: “Thank you so much. You’ve been so helpful!”

Me: “Okay, here are your room keys. The room number is written inside and the elevator is around the corner.”

Guest: “Great, thanks! Oh, I was just wondering, do you have a breakfast?”

Me: “Yes, sir, we do. It’s from 6-10 AM tomorrow, down here next to the lobby in the breakfast room.”

(I point to room right next to lobby.)

Guest: “Okay. Now, I have a laptop. Do you have wireless internet and what’s the password to log on?”

Me: “Yes, there’s wireless throughout the hotel; there is no password.”

Guest: “Where’s your gym? Are you open now?”

Me: “Yes, it’s open until 10 PM. It’s down the hallways.”

Guest: “Oh, okay. I just wanted to ask everything before you went home for the day because there’s no one here after midnight, I assume.”

Me: “As I mentioned, there is someone at the desk 24/7.”

(The guest’s girlfriend/wife, who has been waiting in the car, comes in.)

Wife: “What’s taking so long?”

Guest: “I have to ask all these questions because she didn’t tell me anything about the hotel when I checked in!”

Me: *shakes head and just smiles*

Guest: “Oh, where’s our room number? You never told me it!”