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Physical Scars Causing Mental Ones

, , , , | Right | November 16, 2019

(I work in intimate apparel so I get a lot of requests for certain underwear and whatnot. I’ve also had my fair share of older women doing questionable things.)

Customer: “Ma’am, do you work here?”

Me: *putting away clothes left in the fitting room* “Yep, sure do! How can I help you today?”

Customer: “I’m looking for all-cotton hipster panties. Do you have them here?”

Me: “Of course; it’s in our panty section. Give me a few seconds and I’ll walk you over.”

(I end up just leaving the pile of bras on my counter to help the woman and lead her to where our panties are.)

Me: “Unfortunately, we don’t have any solid colors. Will that be okay?”

Customer: “Colors and patterns don’t matter to me; I just need all-cotton hipsters. I just had a surgery that removed a portion of my bowels and I don’t want anything on my scar.”

Me: “That’s super easy to find, so if you would check this table display rig—”

(Right as I’m speaking, the customer pulls up her shirt and unbuttons her pants. Much to my absolute horror, she starts to tug her pants down to the — luckily empty — floor which exposes the panties she is currently wearing.)

Customer: “See where they cut me open?” *points to the very obvious scar on her stomach* “I need panties to make sure they don’t touch this scar.”

Me: *unsure what to do and what to say* “R-right, ma’am. These panties right here are what you are looking for—” *spots my manager* “O-Oh! I need to go talk to my manager! If I’m not back, the plus-size cashier would be happy to help you—”

Customer: “Thank you so much, sweetheart. I appreciate your help.” *fixes her clothes as if nothing happened* 

(I speed-walked to the department manager who was closing that night and told them I was taking my break right then and there. I didn’t tell them what happened but I’m sure loss prevention had a blast laughing at me and my panic of what the woman did.)

Question of the Week

What is the absolute most stupid thing you’ve heard a customer say?

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