Photo-Stroppy

(I work in a print shop. We hand out coupons that get you a free color photocopy on heavier-than-usual paper. For what it is the quality isn’t too bad, though, obviously, it can’t beat a proper photo print.)

Customer: *hands me a poster of some kind along with the coupon* “I got one of these coupons, and I’d like a copy of this. My own printer isn’t doing the colors right.”

Me: “All right, I’ll see what I can do.”

(I make the first copy, adjusting the colors according to my experience, so that the final product will be as close to the original as possible. Still, being a photocopy, there’s no way it can reproduce the original exactly.)

Customer: “I don’t like the way the orange looks here. Can you make it more yellow?”

Me: “Sure, I’ll try to adjust it a bit more. These things tend to be a bit tricky, but luckily, we’ve got all evening!”

(I make another copy, and then a third one, and then a fourth one, every time fixing this or that shade, all according to the wishes of the customer. Mind you, this is all for a print that she isn’t going to pay for, but I do take some pride in my work, and there aren’t other customers at the moment. Finally, we end up with two very similar prints.)

Customer: *looking between the two prints, tsking and frowning* “I don’t know. I really don’t know. They’re both still off. Can I take them with me to see which one would work best for what I need it for?”

Me: “I’m sorry, but I can’t let you take both. The coupon gets you one, not two.”

Customer: *suddenly extremely indignant* “But this quality is terrible! I could have done it better on my home printer!”

Me: “Yes, well, photocopiers usually cannot produce the same quality as most photo printers. They’re two very different things.”

Customer: “You’re a printing company; you should have better quality than this!”

(I’m getting tired. After printing her multiple proofs and trying my best to get her what she’s looking for while she is being difficult and rude, I’m starting to think it isn’t worth it, especially since she’s getting it for free.)

Me: “We do, but we can’t do anything about the quality of a photocopier. Unfortunately, it’s a photocopy, not a photo.”

Customer: *shoves the coupon in my face* “Then what good is this?!”

Me: “It’s good for people who want a photocopy. Really, it’s either take it or leave it.”

(She yelled at me about terrible customer service and threatened to call the CEO. I didn’t feel too bad, because after all, we didn’t lose any business on her.)