Phoning In Your Day’s Work

(I work for a small daycare. Because I don’t wear a watch, I tend to carry my phone around in my back pocket to keep track of the time, as we have to sign the kids in and out on a clipboard. My phone is smaller than the more popular phones that are owned by others. The four-year-olds are fascinated by it, especially by the fact that it has physical buttons and no touch screen. The weather has been hot this week, and my warm-weather clothing tends to have no pockets, so I set the phone down next to the clipboard when we go outside. I am watching a pair of troublemakers across the playground when I hear the faint ringing of an outgoing call. Looking to my right, I see a child with a guilty look on his face and my active phone in his hand. He had hit the right combination of buttons to not only access my contact list, but to call them on speaker-phone!)

Me: *grabbing phone* “[Child #1]! Who did you call?”

(I panic briefly, wondering who on my contact list would not find it funny to get a phone call from a naughty four-year-old. But then I hear a familiar voice.)

Coworker: “[Daycare]. This is [Coworker] speaking.”

Me: “Hey, [Coworker]. This is [My Name] out on the playground. [Child #1] is messing with my phone.”

Coworker: *laughing* “Okay.” *hangs up*

(Today is more of the same: out on the playground, phone on the bench, no pockets. [Child #2] picks up my phone.)

Child #2: “Is this your phone? It’s small.”

Me: “Yes. Please don’t call the front desk, like [Child #1] did yesterday.”

(Child #2 gives me a mischievous, toothless grin.)

Child #2: “I AM gonna call someone! I’m gonna call Donald Trump!”

Me: “Don’t call Donald Trump; that sounds expensive!”

(Little bugger took off across the playground with my phone. When I got it back, there were several random photos in the camera section. I am sewing pockets into every article of clothing that I own.)