Phenotypical Incorrectness

(At the campground where I work, two girls complain that someone has stolen their picnic table. So, I go out, find it, and help them drag it back to their site. When they check out, they write on our comment card that I was helpful and friendly.)

Me: *reading the comment card* “Oh, those nice lesbians gave me a positive comment!

Coworker: “How do you know those girls were lesbians? Just because they were camping together doesn’t mean they were! The could just be friends. You’re being rude!”

Me: “Well, seeing as one of them had a tattoo with intertwined female symbols, complained about being labeled as butch while we were moving the table, and kissed the other when she bought her ice cream, I’m gonna go with lesbians.”