Pee Happens: A Novel

, , , , , , | Right | January 29, 2019

(We are attached to a mall. Our store is the only location outside the mall with a public restroom. Due to this, our bathrooms tend to be every shopper’s first stop. We try to keep it as clean as possible, but on busier days we can only check it once or twice every couple of hours. After one busy weekend day, we were just about to do a clean, when a woman marches over to my coworkers and me.)

Customer: *angrily points* “You! You need to fix the bathroom. I use it all the time and it’s disgusting.”

Me: “I’m sorr–”

(Customer cuts me off by slamming her fist onto the nearest bookshelf.)

Customer: “No! It’s disgusting and you are just lazy and just as disgusting if you think that’s acceptable. You are not getting paid to just stand. You need to work!”

Me: “We are actually just about–”

Customer: “No! It’s gross. You MUST do something! It smelled like pee and there was some on the seat! I can’t believe you allow that to happen.”

Me: “Um, what would you like us to do? Pee happens.”

(With that, she turned bright red, slammed her fists again, and stormed away. My coworkers could not stop laughing. The kicker, the bathroom was not bad at all. Not even toilet paper on the floor.)

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