Past Its Prime Rib

Customer: “Your ham keeps going bad!”

The customer places a half-eaten deli ham from a factory-sealed pouch on the counter. I could smell it before I saw it.

Me: “Sir, when did you open the package?”

Customer: “When I bought it.”

Me: *Looking at the receipt.* “So… two weeks ago?”

Customer: “Yes, but the expiration date is tomorrow! It’s going bad early!”

Me: “Sir, the expiration date is if the pack remains sealed and unopened. When opened, you have less time to eat it before it goes bad.”

Customer: “Hmm, no, that’s not right. Your ham is bad before the expiry date. I want a refund.”

Since we couldn’t prove when he opened the package, the manager did the refund.

He did it two weeks later when the customer came by with the same type of ham again. The manager gave him a more detailed explanation of how long the ham should last after being opened.

When the customer tried it a third time, the manager said:

Manager: “Sir, either you’re incredibly stupid, or you think we’ll keep refunding you so that you can get free ham, which is also stupid, since we have memories. I won’t be refunding this again.”

The customer stopped after that, but man they’ll try anything!