Parenting Can Be Hair-Raising

As anyone who works in a family salon will know, cutting the hair of a child, especially a toddler, can be a lot of work. They’re fussy, they cry, they move around a lot, and they really don’t want to be there. That’s fine, really; they’re kids, and they don’t know how to process this scary stranger coming at their head with sharp-looking objects.

Along with giving us all some training, our salon encourages toddlers to sit on their parent’s laps when having a haircut, so they can be a calming presence and soothe them when it gets a bit too much for them.

A mother walks in with her two-year-old son who looks a bit overdue for a haircut. It’s not that his hair is long; it’s just scruffy and all over the place. Like a pet going to the vet, this child has just realized where he is, and he DOES NOT LIKE IT. He immediately begins wailing and fighting to leave. The mother picks him up and just… hands him to me.

Customer: “It’s [Son] with an appointment for [time half an hour ago]. I’d like a four on the top and a high fade on the sides, please.”

Me: “Okay. Would you like to take a seat here? We can place him on your lap so that—”

Customer: “Oh, I’m fine over here, thanks!”

She then takes a seat in the waiting area and starts browsing her phone.

Left holding a wailing, squirming child, I carry him over to our special child seat that looks like a racing car — steering wheel and everything. No dice. I try several methods, such as telling him how handsome he will look with a haircut, playing some “Paw Patrol” on my phone, and offering a lollypop (with the mother’s permission… when I finally got her attention). Sadly, nothing works.

Me: “Ma’am, I am not able to cut your son’s hair when he is like this. I’ve found that when children are sat with their parent, they are much more consolable.”

Customer: “Oh, he’s just being fussy. Just make a start and he’ll calm down.”

She looks back down at her phone.

For clarity, we know what fussy children are like. They will cry and moan and try to make a scene, but they’re generally okay, especially with the parent there to calm them down. They might cry through the whole “ordeal”, but they’ll sit there and accept that the haircut is going to happen.

This is not that.

Me: “Ma’am, this is not being fussy. He is in a state of emotional distress, and he is physically blocking any attempt I am making at approaching him. It would be unsafe for him if I even attempted a haircut. Please find a way to console him or bring him back when he has calmed down.”

Customer: *Tuts* “I’m sure you can figure it out. Isn’t this your job?”

Me: “My job, ma’am, is to safely cut your son’s hair. It isn’t to physically restrain him and force a haircut on him while he is in a state of emotional distress. As his mother, you either need to find a way to make this all right with him or come back another time.”

Customer: “You’re a totally useless hairdresser!”

Me: “And you seem like a totally useless mother. I have your name and number from the appointment book. Are you going to calm down your son or do I need to call someone?”

She glares at me but finally puts down her phone. She picks up her distraught son and storms toward the exit, but not before turning back to me.

Customer: “I was about to pass a super hard level on Candy Crush! I hope you’re happy!” *Leaves*

Another customer who saw the whole thing comments:

Customer #2: “Did she just compare parenting to Candy Crush?”