Sharing Is Berry Important

| London, England, UK | At The Checkout, Bizarre, Family & Kids, Food & Drink

(A young girl and her granddad approach my till and he indicates the open bag of cranberries in her hand.)

Man: “I’d like to pay for those, please.”

Me: “Of course, sir. That’ll be 99p, please.”

Girl: “Would you like one, Granddad?”

Man: “No, thank you, darling.”

(The little girl then reaches over the counter to offer the bag to me.)

Girl: “Would you like one?”

Me: *surprised* “Oh, no, thank you! But it’s very nice of you to offer.”

Girl: *sternly* “You should ALWAYS share!”

Dishing Out The Cold Truth

| UT, USA | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid, Technology

(It’s been snowing steadily all day. Still, customers come to shop for electronics and ask stupid questions.)

Customer: “I bought [Satellite TV Service] here, but I’m having trouble with it. Can you help?”

Me: “I usually handle computer questions, not TV questions, but I can try. What’s going on?”

Customer: “The channels just aren’t coming through right. They’re all pixelated, and they keep cutting out, and sometimes there’s nothing to see or hear at all.”

Me: “That’s not good. When did it start?”

Customer: “This morning.”

Me: “I haven’t heard of any problems from [Satellite TV Provider]. I’m guessing that it has something to do with the snowstorm. The snow could be interfering with your signal, especially if some has accumulated in the dish of your receiver.”

Customer: “Can you check?”

Me: “Can I check what?”

Customer: “Can you get on your computer and check to see if I have snow on my dish?”

Me: “…no, I can’t do that.”

Customer: “Why not?”

Me: “The store computers don’t have access to information about whether a person’s satellite dish has snow in it. I’m sorry.”

Customer: “Well, how can I find out?”

Me: “You could try going home and looking at it…”

You Can Do It, Put Your Butt In To It

| Oklahoma City, OK, USA | Movies & TV, Rude & Risque, Technology

(I work at a call center for a satellite TV company. I am speaking with a male customer who speaks in a slightly feminine voice.)

Customer: “I need credit for this movie I ordered.”

Me: “Was something wrong with the movie, sir?”

Customer: “No. But I didn’t mean to order it. I just sat on my remote and it ordered the movie.”

(I hear a voice in the background similar to the customer’s voice.)

Background Voice: “You always did have a talented butt.”