This Customer Gets Her Own Dedicated Plaque

| ON, Canada | Right | August 28, 2015

Customer: “I’m picking up laminating.”

Me: “Okay, what name is it under?”

Customer: “[Customer Name].”

(I look in the filing system and don’t see any order forms filed under her name.)

Me: “Is there another name it might be under?”

Customer: “[Customer Name].”

Me: “So there aren’t any orders under either of those names. Is there a different name you might have given us when you dropped it off?”

Customer: “No, you called me.”

Me: “Right, but I don’t see it here, so I was just wondering if you gave us a different name.”

Customer: *slowly and condescendingly* “[Customer Name].”

(I ignore the obvious rude and ignorant tone, and proceed to look through ALL files, to see if it was filed wrong. I don’t see the order form anywhere.)

Me: “And it was laminating?”

Customer: “[Customer Name]!”

Me: “I’m asking you what you had done. You had something laminated?”

Customer: “YOU CALLED ME AND SAID IT WAS READY!”

Me: “I understand that. But I don’t see anything here under that name, so I’m trying to narrow down why I don’t see it. Was it laminating?”

Customer: “[Customer Name]!”

(I then look in all the bins and read all the stickers on them to see if we lost the order form, but the order is still in a bin. Nothing.)

Me: “Did someone else pick it up already, maybe?”

Customer: “You called me today! I don’t understand why this is so hard! It’s just a picture!”

Me: “A laminated picture?” *finally realizing she probably meant plaque mounting* “Was it plaqued?”

Customer: “[Customer Name]!”

Me: “I’m not asking for the name, I’m asking if you had it plaque mounted.”

Customer: “[Customer Name]!”

(I look in the area where we keep the plaque mounted pictures, and sure enough, her order is there.)

Me: “It was plaque mounted, not laminated. That’s why I couldn’t find it. They’re in a different spot.”

Customer: “You called me earlier today.”

(I don’t even try anymore. I get her to sign that it was picked up, and say nothing else to her.)

5 Minutes Before Closing

| Right | August 28, 2015

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Finally Tagged You

| Waterbury, CT, USA | Right | August 28, 2015

(Our store sells used clothing. An elderly woman and her even older mother come in every Wednesday, which has 50% off a specific tag color. The price tags (which are stapled on) are always hanging off their purchases. We know she is changing them while in the dressing room but can’t prove it.)

Me: “Hello! Find everything okay?”

Customer: “Yes. A few of the tags fell off while I was trying them on, though.”

Me: *noticing one specific outfit, tag barely on* “I’m sorry; this one is not on sale.”

Customer: “But it’s the sale color!”

Me: “Ma’am, I priced this myself this morning. You changed the tags.”

(The customer turned all shades of red and stormed out with her mother. It was a few months before she came back, and all the tags were secure and correct from then on!)

A Sprinkle Of Stupidity

| Salem, OR, USA | Right | August 28, 2015

(I work at a pizza place that often allows customers to switch out ingredients, as long as they are not adding any extra.)

Customer: “I want the all meat with no sausage, add bacon, and add green pepper.”

Me: “Great, sir. We can take the sausage off, but unfortunately I can only add one other ingredient. You’ll have to choose which one you’d like.”

Customer: “What if I add bacon but only get a spritz of green pepper?”

Me: “You’d still be getting one too many.”

Customer: “What about a dash?”

Me: “Sir, the manner in which we apply the ingredient won’t make any difference.”

No Vocation For Location, Part 10

| Oklahoma City, OK , USA | Right | August 28, 2015

(I work at a veterinary hospital that is part of a chain located inside a popular pet supply store.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [Vet]. This is [My Name]. How can I help you?”

Customer: “Ya, this is the office at [our location], isn’t it?”

Me: “Yes, ma’am, it is.”

Customer: “I was wondering about your other locations. Can you tell me where they are?”

Me: “I can do that for you. Was there a particular location or area you were interested in?”

Customer: “Ya, where is your 63rd & May location?”

Me: “…Ma’am?”

Customer: “Ya, where is your 63rd & May location?”

Me: “Um, it’s up on May Street at about 63rd Street.”

Customer: “Great! Thank you for your help!”

Related:
No Vocation For Location, Part 9
No Vocation For Location, Part 8
No Vocation For Location, Part 7

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