A Very Heated Argument

| ON, Canada | Right | March 21, 2017

(I work at a pizzeria with a counter for selling individual slices. It’s late in the day but I still have four fresh pepperoni pizzas for sale. They just came out of the oven as per my request to the baker, to minimize the transition between lunch and dinner. It’s three pm and my coworker will be handling the counter when she arrives at four.)

Customer: *approaches the counter* “I’ll have four pepperoni slices and a [Drink]!”

Me: *inputs this into the computer* “That’ll be [price].”

Customer: *drops money into my hand* “Make sure they’re hot!”

Me: “The baker just made these.” *I carefully touch the pizza on top with my gloves on; it feels hot*

(I dish up the slices and get the customer his Drink from the fridge. The customer sits down to eat at a table, while I begin restocking the pop and juice in the fridge. The customer then screams at me and throws a slice of hot pizza at my head; luckily, I’m wearing a hat, but there is now cheese in my ponytail. I feel something hit the back of my head; the boiling hot cheese.)

Me: “Umm, can I help you?”

Customer: “These! Are! Cold!”

Me: *startled* “Um… umm.. sir… sir… actually… the cheese in my hair feels hot… ummm… and it really hurts.”

Customer: “I demand to speak to the manager!”

Me: “Actually… the owner is… right here.”

(The owner had been sweeping in front out the counter. He’s a short Italian man with a temper, but is always nice to me. He refers to all of the teenage and early twenty-year-old staff as “his kids.” He saw the whole thing.)

Owner: “Did you just throw a slice of pizza at one of my kids who was nothing but nice?”

Customer: *stammers* “But… she… It’s… It’s cold.”

Owner: “Get the f*** out of my restaurant.”

Customer: *scampers out*

Owner: *to me* “Go wash the cheese out of your hair; I’ll watch the front. You’re on break. And ya can’t let anyone talk to you like that!”

(I return from cleaning my hair and hat to find my food upstairs, paid for already. Apparently the guy came back to apologize and paid for my lunch!)

Food For Tots

| Columbus, OH, USA | Right | March 21, 2017

(I work at a fast food restaurant that offers fries and tater tots; you choose one for your meal.)

Customer: “I need a number four, with [Drink].”

Me: “Okay, did you want fries or tots with that?”

Customer: “Chili cheese tots.”

Me: “Okay, anything else?”

Customer: “No.”

(We prepare the food, I take it out, and a few minutes later they are back to complain.)

Customer: “I didn’t get my fries!”

Me: “You didn’t order fries. I had you down for chili cheese tots.”

Customer: “I know, but there’s a picture of fries on the menu! It comes with fries!”

Me: “It says at the top ‘your choice of tots or fries,’ and you chose tots. I can ring you out for an extra order of fries, if you like.”

Customer: “NO! It’s your fault; you need to fix it! There’s a picture of fries. That means I get fries AND tots.”

(After several minutes of arguing back and forth, and my manager coming out to explain that you can’t get two sides, he sped off in the middle of a sentence.)

There Is Mushroom For Improvement

| USA | Right | March 21, 2017

(A client left a message on the answering machine that her dog needed his ‘portabello.’ I call her back.)

Me: “Hi, this is [My Name] calling from [Vet]. We got your message about setting an appointment for [Dog].”

Client: “Yes, he needs his portabello for the kennel.”

Me: *trying so hard not to laugh* “Yes, he is due for his bordetella, as well as the rest of his vaccines. When were you looking to make the appointment?”

Client: “No, the kennel said he needed his portabello!”

Me: “The vaccine is actually called bordetella, ma’am. Portabello are a type of mushroom.”

Client: “Well, the kennel said portabello…” *grumbles*

(We set the appointment, and the minute we hung up, I nearly died laughing.)

Not So Sweet About The Syrup

| CA, USA | Right | March 21, 2017

(I’m working the closing shift at work and, earlier in the night, we had run out of an ingredient to make one of the lattes. I’m working the drive-thru when I get this customer.)

Me: “Hi, thanks for choosing [Popular Coffee Chain]! What can I get started for you?

Customer: “Yeah, I’d like a [Popular Latte] with soy.”

Me: “Unfortunately, we’re all out of [syrup] for tonight. I’m so sorry about that.”

Customer: *angrily* “Well, I think that calls for a free drink!”

Me: “…”

Customer: “Okay, well, then, never mind.”

Me: “Are you sure I can’t get you some water for the trouble of coming out?”

Customer: “Nope. Bye!” *backs out of drive-thru*

(No, you’re not going to get a free drink just because we’re out of an ingredient, especially when you rudely demand it. The only thing I’ll get you for your trouble is water. Other people have come through that night wanting the same drink you ordered and were understanding and just ordered something else. And they were nice about it, too!)

Honesty Begins At Home(owner)

| USA | Right | March 21, 2017

(My store has a price for contractors and a higher price for regular homeowners. We’ve tried various ways to subtly ask if a caller is a contractor, so we don’t lose their business by automatically giving out the higher homeowner price, but the subtle ways haven’t worked well. This caller has already been borderline rude before this exchange.)

Caller: “Yeah, how much is your [Product]?”

Me: “Sir, are you a contractor or a homeowner?”

Caller: *snottily* “Well, which answer is gonna get me a better price?”

Me: “The one where you’re a contractor and can PROVE it.”

Caller: “D*** it, fine. I’m just a homeowner.”

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