All Buttoned Up And Going Nowhere (Video)

| Right | October 27, 2016

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This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 57

, | GA, USA | Right | October 27, 2016

(I am an Internet sales consultant in an automotive dealership. Someone expresses interest in one of our used vehicles online, so I call them to follow up. Here is how the conversation goes.)

Me: “Hello, I’m looking for [Customer]?”

Customer: “Yes, this is [Customer].”

Me: “Hey, [Customer], this is [My Name] at [Car Dealership]. I saw you were interested in our 2007 [Make & Model] and I wanted to see how I can help!”

Customer: “Oh, great, yeah. I really, really, like that car. Um… I wanted to know what the qualifications were in order to get it?”

Me: “So you’re interested in financing?”

Customer: “Yes.”

Me: “Okay! We generally just start by having you fill out our credit application. We’re not a ‘buy here, pay here’ place, so we do finance through real banks… Have you ever financed a vehicle before?”

Customer: “No, this will be my first time.”

Me: “Do you have any other lines of credit open?”

Customer: “Uhhh… yeah, uh, I got an old cell phone bill that is now with a place called the uh… credit bureau.”

Me: “Oh, so like a collection account.”

Customer: “Yeah, yeah yes that.”

(I emailed him a credit application and I’m waiting to see just how bad it is.)


We’re Living In A Bag Dystopia

| KY, USA | Right | October 27, 2016

(I’ve just finished ringing up a customer’s to-go order.)

Me: “Would you like a bag for all that?”

Customer: “Oh, do you have bags?”

Me: “Y-yes. Would you like one?”

Customer: “Ooh, could I have one?”

Me: “Um, sure.”

(I guess it sounded too good to be true.)

Your Patience Needs A Lot Of Mileage

| MA, USA | Right | October 27, 2016

(A customer comes in during the morning rush in the service department. We get a lot of questions from customers that don’t understand that the maintenance interval is EITHER determined by time OR mileage, whichever comes first.)

Customer: “I just bought my car, and someone called me telling me I needed service. I don’t need service now!”

Coworker: “Okay, if you’re not at the service mileage, we recommend that you have service done every five months anyway so you don’t miss your free services.”

Customer: “I don’t care. I just want you people to stop calling me! It disturbs my husband. He has Alzheimer’s, and he can’t tell when to come in for service, Please don’t call me anymore!”

Coworker: “I can add you to the do not call list.”

Customer: “Please.”

Coworker: *processes change to customer’s contact preference* “Okay, you’re all set.”

Customer: “So, how do I know when to come for service? Will you call me and remind me when I get to the mileage?”

Me & Manager: *cringe*

They’re Probably Grumpy In The Daytime Too

, | Norman, OK, USA | Right | October 27, 2016

(I work as a dispatcher for a university police department. I work night shift. I stay up all night even on my days off. It is about two or three in the morning and the phone rings.)

Me: “[My Name], Police Department.”

Caller: *an older female* “Y’all need to turn your stadium lights off!”

(Football is a religion in this town. The gigantic football stadium is practically right in the middle of everything, and its lights are often kept on at night for workers.)

Me: “I’m sorry?”

Caller: “I’m trying to sleep and those d*** lights are shining right into my house!”

Me: I’m sorry about that, ma’am. It’s up to the athletic department to turn the lights on and off, but I can pass it along to my lieutenant and see if anything can be done.”

Caller: *further ranting about not being able to sleep and how inconsiderate the university is, etc. before hanging up*

(Had I not been on a recorded line, I might have pointed out the irony to her in calling a night shift worker in the middle of the night and complaining about not being able to sleep to someone who has to sleep in the middle of the day. With the noise. And the light. And the traffic…)

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