The Picture Of Stupid

| Finland | Right | December 25, 2015

(Christmas is our busiest season and our most popular item is a calendar with your own pictures. We have several different ones; you can choose the size, paper, and if it has name days or room for taking notes. A young woman in her 20s walks in with a USB.)

Customer: “What kind of calendars do you have? I have my pictures here.”

(I show her all our calendars and she takes good 30 minutes trying to decide. I have to stand next to her during that time because she asks lots of questions and finds something wrong with EVERY calendar we have. One has too big pictures, one too small etc… Finally she makes a decision and we start making the calendar with our computer.)

Customer: “Uh, why is my picture so small? In that calendar it’s much bigger.”

Me: “We can make it bigger but you have a vertical photo and this picture area is horizontal, so something is going to get cut out if we do that.”

Customer: “What?! No, I don’t want anything cut out! Just put it in there, but bigger!”

(I patiently explain to her that she needs a horizontal picture if she wants it bigger; this picture won’t work. She just doesn’t get it.)

Customer: “I’m just going to go somewhere else! You clearly don’t know what you are doing.”

(Thanks for wasting my time! It is not my fault you don’t understand the difference between vertical and horizontal!)

You Sold Yourself Out For Christmas

| Right | December 24, 2015

Gifted With Foresight Of Her Reaction

| Vancouver, BC, Canada | Right | December 24, 2015

(I work in a store that sells things like lotions, body wash, and perfume. Around Christmas, a male customer comes in and asks me for help.)

Customer: “My girlfriend gave me this list of things she wants…”

(He hands me the list and I look it over.)

Me: “Oh, you’re in luck! We just happen to have a gift set that contains two of each of the items on this list, plus a few others, and because it’s on for half price right now, it’ll cost you about the same as it would to just buy these items individually.”

Customer: “Can you show me that?”

(I show him the set, and he looks at it closely.)

Customer: “Hmm… It’s got lip balm in it. I don’t think she’d like that. I’ll just buy the items on the list.”

Me: “Okay. It’s going to cost you about the same, though, for half as much product. Are you okay with that?”

Customer: “Yeah, that’s fine. That’s what she wants.”

Me: “Okay, fair enough.”

(I help him gather up all the items, take him to the till and begin ringing him up. As he watches me scan, he looks back at the gift set.)

Customer: “Wait, what I am doing? I’ll take that set!”

Me: *laughing* “Good idea.”

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That’s How The Christmas Cookie Crumbles

| San Francisco, CA, USA | Right | December 24, 2015

(I am 16 years old. Several customers can discern my age from my small size and tend to try to intimidate me. Understandably, we are extremely busy during December, and I have just finished an interaction with a disgruntled customer.)

Me: “Hello, sir, how are you today?”

Awesome Customer: “My family and I come in here all of the time, so we feel that you guys are a part of our family, too. We brought you these cookies. Merry Christmas!”

(This was quite possibly the nicest thing anyone had done for our staff this holiday season. Happy Holidays, everyone!)

No Dress Is Worth This Price

| High Wycombe, England, UK | Right | December 24, 2015

(It’s a few weeks until Christmas. I work for a small concession on the women’s clothing floor in an upmarket department store. A man holding a very large, rather hideous, full-length formal gown stops me.)

Customer: “I don’t know my partner’s size, so if it’s the wrong size, or she doesn’t like it, what can she do? But I don’t want her to know how much I spent.”

Me: “Okay, you can get a gift receipt when you purchase the dress. That way she won’t know how much the dress costs, and she can exchange the dress by herself.”

Customer: “But what if it’s a different price?”

Me: “Either the difference will have to be paid, or she will get a gift card with the rest of the money. Unfortunately, with a gift receipt; we can’t pay cash or put it on a card unless it’s the same card.”

Customer: “But then she will know how much the dress cost…”

Me: “She won’t know the exact price if you have a gift receipt, but if she needs another size, she will probably see the price tag.”

Customer: “But how do I stop her finding out what the price is?”

Me: “If she needs to change it, you could go with her?”

Customer: “But I don’t want to do that. I just don’t want her to find out the price.”

Me: “That’s what the gift receipt is for.”

Customer: “But if she changes it, and it’s a different price, she’ll know?”

(This went on for a while.)

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