Top 5 Funniest Stories Of November 2014

Not Always Right | Roundups

November 2014 Top Story Roundup: Here are Not Always Right’s top-rated stories for last month!

    1. Justice Is Music To My Ears (3,173 thumbs up)

 

    1. Just Telling It Like It Is (2,471 thumbs up)

 

    1. Should Have Maintained Radio Silence (2,303 thumbs up)

 

    1. Keeps Coming Back For More For Less (2,259 thumbs up)

 

  1. Your Connection Is Totally Forked (2,243 thumbs up)

PS #1: check out our new Extras section, with pictures, videos, and news!

PS #2: Read more roundups here!

This Customer Is Soda-pressing

| VA, USA | Bad Behavior, Food & Drink

(I am a barista at a famous, internationally known coffee shop and working at the cash register. The company at the moment only sells coffee-related drinks, ‘frappuccinos,’ teas, and other caffeine/coffee related products for drinks.)

Me: “Good morning, ma’am! And what can I get for you?”

Customer: “I’d like a ham artisan sandwich.”

Me: “All right, and anything to drink?

Customer: “And I want a diet [Soda].”

Me: *thinking that I misheard her* “I’m sorry, ma’am, what did you say?”

Customer: “I SAID I want a diet [Soda].”

Me: “Oh, um, I’m sorry, ma’am; we don’t… carry that here.”

Customer: *looks at me with both eyebrows raised, incredulously* “You don’t carry soda?”

Me: “No, ma’am.”

Customer: *throws her head back, scoffing* “That’s ridiculous! Fine, then I’ll just have a…” *looks at the menu* “I’ll just have a coffee then.”

Me: “All right, just a coffee? Would you like the medium blend? Or a different brew?” *we have a light, medium, dark, and decaf at the ready right behind me*

Customer: *scoffs again* “Just a coffee! Whatever!”

Me: “All right, one medium coffee. Anything else?”

Customer: “That’s all!” *she looks at her friend/coworker the whole time as if this was all a tiring exchange*

Doubly Impressive

| UK | Family & Kids, Hotels & Lodging

(My parents are the customers in this story. They are staying at a very charming B&B in Britain.)

Mum: “I can’t believe how well the owner looks after this place, especially considering that he’s on his own.”

Dad: “I know! Everything’s spotless. He must work terribly hard; it seems that every time I turn around I see him busy doing something.”

Mum: “Hey, there’s the owner over there. Let’s go tell him what a great job he’s doing.”

Dad: “…that’s strange. I saw him only a few minutes ago, and I could have sworn he was wearing a different shirt.”

Owner: *overhearing* “You do realize that I have a twin brother, right?”

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5 Stories Of Christmas Calamities

Not Always Right | Roundups

Weekly Roundup: 5 Stories Of Christmas Calamities It’s the most wonderful time of the year, unless you work in retail…

  1. He’s Furbious (2,289 thumbs up)
  2. Political Correctness Takes A Holiday (2,889 thumbs up)
  3. A Bad Hair Day (3,281 thumbs up)
  4. A Time For Giving (A Piece Of Your Mind) (2,547 thumbs up)
  5. These Customers Come But Once A Year (2,839 thumbs up)

PS #1: check out our Extras section, with pictures, videos, and news!

PS #2: Read more roundups here!

Doesn’t Know How To Window Shop

| England, UK | Bizarre, Crazy Requests, Home Improvement

(I work in a bargains store where people can get almost anything for less than the RRP. An elderly customer approaches me.)

Customer: “Will these curtains fit my window?”

Me: “What size is the window you’re buying for?”

Customer: “Living room.”

Me: “No, sorry I mean like what are the measurements for it?”

Customer: “It’s a normal front living room window.”

Me: “Every window is different. These ones you’ve picked out are 90″x90″, so they would fit a fairly large window. Do you know the size in inches, or even centimetres? We can work from there.”

Customer: “No, but it’s the same size window as everyone else on my street, so I think it’ll be the same for everywhere. Would they fit your window?”

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