Totally Floored

| USA | Bizarre, Extra Stupid

(I am hanging up clothes as a customer walks up to me.)

Customer: “Hey, The elevators aren’t working, and the escalators aren’t working. How am I supposed to get down stairs?”

(I am a little shocked at the question, but before I can answer:)

Customer: “Never mind.” *walks away*

(About an hour later, I walk down the non-working escalator to the first floor in order to take a break. I see the same customer making a purchase. I wonder if it took the guy an hour to figure out how to get downstairs.)

This Is Spyro-ing Out Of Control

| Australia | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid, Family & Kids, Technology

(I am flicking through some pre-owned games, minding my own business when a late 20s age looking woman speaks to me:)

Customer: “Do you know where the Skylanders discs are?”

(As much as I would like to work there, I don’t work there. I don’t have a uniform or anything that says I work there. I was most likely in a shirt with a game reference on it.)

Me: “What, Skylanders discs? I don’t know what you are talking about.”

Customer: “You’re a boy. You should know what they are. My little [Son] wants me to get him some characters for his game.”

Me: “Um, Skylanders characters aren’t discs but toy figures, and I don’t work here.”

Customer: “You are lying. Prove that Skylanders are toys.”

(I take this woman over to the ‘Skylanders’ toys and give a random one to her.)

Customer: “This is just a toy, not a disc.”

Me: “Okay, you must have seen your son play the game. These are what you put on a pad thing to play the character.”

Customer: “But then how do you explain how the game saves then?”

Me: “Have you ever used wireless internet?”

Customer: “Yes, why?”

Me: “It is like that on a small scale, and only works with the toys. Now are you going buy one of the toys?”

(The customer’s eyes shoot open.)

Customer: “I don’t remember what ones he wanted.”

Timeshare Beware

| HI, USA | Bad Behavior, Spouses & Partners, Tourists/Travel

(My wife and I are forced to sit in a timeshare presentation as part of our reduced cost stay at a resort. We had already decided it would be crazy for us to buy a timeshare as we have not yet even bought our own house.)

Salesman: “So, can you tell us your personal priorities?”

(My wife, who is an Ivy-League educated lawyer who works in not-for-profit human rights law, speaks up.)

My Wife: “Money… Power! RESPECT!”

(The salesman looks surprised while I turn to my wife:)

Me: “Well, I guess I didn’t know we had such different priorities… for me it i about the little things… blunts, bling, and b****es!”

(They really hated us.)

This Customer Is Phoney

| Leeds, England, UK | Bad Behavior, Family & Kids, Liars & Scammers, Technology

(It’s the early 2000s, and my dad and I are at my grandma’s house. We see a salesman making his way around the street, and my dad says he’ll deal with him when he gets to us.)

Salesman: “Hello, sir! I’d just like to talk to you about your telephone service.”

Dad: “Sorry, I don’t believe in phones.”

Salesman: “You… don’t believe in phones?”

Dad: “No, I don’t. I don’t think they’ll ever catch on.”

(At this point, I’m not sure if the salesman is playing along or genuinely believes him.)

Salesman: “Oh, but sir! Telephones are very popular now! Everybody uses them! Some people even have small ones they can carry around with them!”

Dad: “That sounds ridiculous! Nope. Sorry, I’m not interested. Goodbye!”

(He then returned inside, and picked up one of his three mobile phones to send a text message.)

5 Stories In A Galaxy Far Far Away…

Not Always Right | Roundups

Weekly Roundup: 5 Stories In A Galaxy Far Far Away… It was recently May the Fourth, and so many of you seemed to participate in ‘Star Wars Day’, that we thought you deserved a roundup!

  1. I Find Your Lack Of T-shirts Disturbing (4,865 thumbs up)
  2. Look Into Your Heart You Know It To Be True (2,344 thumbs up)
  3. I Have A Good Feeling About This (3,222 thumbs up)
  4. Love A Jedi Shall Know (11,180 thumbs up)
  5. Be Scared Of Customers You Will (5,127 thumbs up)

PS #1: check out our Extras section, with pictures, videos, and news!

PS #2: Read more roundups here!

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