God Loves Little Boys Who Stand Up For Others

| Bath, England, UK | At The Checkout, Bigotry, Family & Kids, Top

(I and my seven-year-old son are shopping for a birthday present for a girl in his class. She’s asked for dressing up clothes or accessories so we get a wand, tiara, and jewellery. I also have our regular shopping in the trolley. We get to the tills and there’s at least a three person queue at each till. We join a queue and have waited a couple of minutes when my son puts the tiara on and waves the wand.)

Son: *in a “posh” voice* “I’m the Queen and I say this line should move faster!”

(I and a few others smile at his playfulness when a man in line at the next till yells at me.)

Man: “You can’t let your son do that. If he turns into a f****t it’ll be your fault.”

(Everyone stops and stares at him in horror whilst the cashiers call for a manager.)

Son: “What’s a f****t?”

Me: “It’s a nasty word that only nasty people use so you mustn’t say it.”

Man: “It means gay, kid.”

Son: “What’s gay?”

Man: “It means you’re bad and going to Hell for being evil.”

Me: “It’s when a man loves a man and a lady loves a lady.”

Son: “Oh, like Uncle James and Uncle Ian?”

Me: “Yep, just like Uncle James and Uncle Ian. They’re not bad, are they?”

(My brother is a paediatric oncologist and his partner is a paediatric nurse. We’ve tried to explain what cancer is and how my brother and his partner make children feel better when they’re poorly.)

Son: “My uncles make children better when they have poorly blood and poorly bones. If you make them go to Hell that means you want the children to be poorly.”

(The manager and a security guard turn up but my son looks this man in the eye and holds his stare.)

Son: “Do you want the children to be poorly? Do you want them to be sick and have to go to Heaven?”

(Everyone is now staring at my son. The man has gone red and is looking around.)

Manager: “Sir, I believe you’ve just been outwitted by a child. You should leave now and keep your disgusting views to yourself and out of my shop.”

(The manager offered to pay for our shopping but I declined. He did, however, offer my son a toy. He chose a dress for his friend’s present.)

Related:
God Loves Little Girls Who Stand Up For Others

Email Fail, Part 3

| ON, Canada | Family & Kids, Technology

(An older man is with a boy about the age of eight. I assume it’s his grandson.)

Me: “Would you like to sign up to have our coupons emailed to you?”

Customer: “No, thanks.”

Me: “Okay.”

Grandson: “He doesn’t even have Internet! Slow down with the emails!”

Related:
Email Fail, Part 2
Email Fail

Pill-Behavior

| Hendersonville, TN, USA | Criminal & Illegal, Health & Body

(I’m the receptionist at an allergist’s clinic that’s just across the street from the city hospital.)

Man: “Hello, I’d like to fill a prescription for one [Name] for [strong allergy medicine].”

(This immediately sets off a red flag in my head, as the name he said was the name of a patient that I can recognize by his face, who comes in for weekly allergy shots, and I’ve never seen this person before.)

Me: “Really, he’s out of medicine already?”

Man: “Yeah, I guess he, uh… took too many doses?”

Me: “I don’t recognize you, sir; are you family?”

Man: “Uh, yeah, I’m Eric [Last Name].”

(I look at my coworker who is listening in, and she immediately walks to the back. The name the man just told me was the name of the normal client, but that client lives with his grandparents who share a different surname.)

Man: “I have his pill bottle if you need proof he sent me.”

(Sure enough, he produces a pill bottle, I take it and set it behind my desk and feign typing information in while an officer walks in.)

Officer: “Hey!”

(The man immediately turned pale as a ghost and tried to bolt past the officer, only to get taken down. The officer hauled the man away as he cussed and hurled threats. Apparently he was a former worker of the client’s grandparents and went through their trash to get an empty pill bottle to try to get medicine to make drugs.)