The Answer Rings True

| Hamlin, NY, USA | Awesome Customers, Food & Drink, Theme Of The Month

(It’s late at night, probably an hour after our normal closing time, and our phone rings.)

Employee: “Hello, [Name] Pizza.”

Caller: “Hi, I’d like to place an order?”

Employee: “I’m sorry, we’ve been closed for about an hour.”

Caller:  *annoyed tone* “Well, why did you answer the phone, then?”

Employee: “…because it rang?”

(The caller burst into laughter and proclaimed that was the best answer he’d ever heard.)

Twenty-One Years And Nine Months

| UK | Crazy Requests, Health & Body

(Overheard at the shop where I work:)

Coworker: “I’m sorry but we can’t accept a pregnancy test as ID… even if it is positive.”

Town Isn’t Big Enough For The Both Of Them

| Sydney, NSW, Australia | Crazy Requests, Extra Stupid

(I have the same first name as another employee who works in another store in another location. The location names both start with B and end with ‘town.’)

Me: “Hi. Can I help you?”

Customer: “I am here to pick up my order. My name is [Customer].”

Me: “Sorry, I don’t have anything to be picked up under that name. When did you order it?”

Customer: “I rang on Thursday and spoke to you.”

Me: “I’m sorry, but I wasn’t working on Thursday.”

Customer: “Yes, you were. You gave me your name.”

Me: “No, I wasn’t here.”

Customer: “WELL, SOMEONE USED YOUR NAME, THEN! I KNOW I SPOKE TO YOU. YOU ARE LYING TO ME!”

Me: *twigging* “Hold on. Just let me make a phone call to see if I can find your order.”

Customer: “About time, too!”

Me: *on phone, loudly* “Hi, this is [My Name] from [B***town] Store. Can I speak to [My Name], please?” *she answers* “Hi, this is [My Name]. By any chance do you have an order put aside for [Customer]? You do? Well she’s here at my store to pick it up.” *to the customer* “You placed your order with [My Name] at [Other B***town] store.”

Customer: “No, I got the number from the catalogue.”

(I show her the catalogue, pointing out the two locations and numbers, right next to each other. There’s no apology, just a demand for it to be sent to us because she needs it today.)

Me: “Sorry, not possible. It can take two weeks to get to us. If you need it you have to go there to pick it up.”

(The customer stomped away.)

Get In Line Or Get Out

| Duluth, MN, USA | Bad Behavior, Extra Stupid, Theme Of The Month

(It is the Christmas season, when our store closes at midnight. A shopper is still shopping in toys at 12:15 when we approach her.)

Me: “Ma’am, can I help you find something? We are closed now and need you to check out so we can go home.”

Customer: “No, I’m just looking.”

Me: “Well, then, we need you to check out. The store has been closed for 15 minutes.”

Customer: “Well, there was a line up there!”

Me: “So… uh… get in it?”

The Front End Is Affronted

, | Saratoga, NY, USA | Bad Behavior, Crazy Requests, Theme Of The Month

(I work in a grocery store in the back in the deli. We have telephones in each department to call other departments and customers and for them to call us. In the summer the deli stays open longer for the tourists than the rest of year. It is now fall so we are closing earlier. We are in the middle of cleaning the department. The phone rings and my coworker answers:)

Coworker: “Hello, deli department.”

Coworker: *pause before he answers* “We closed at eight.”

Coworker: *another pause, then:* “No, we currently close at eight.”

(He hangs up and then several minutes later it rings again. He picks up again.)

Coworker: “Hello, deli department.” *pause* “No, we do close at eight. We are not open to ten. We are open to eight.”

(He hangs up and turns to me:)

Coworker: “It was the same person and I am going to lose it if they call again!”

(The phone rings a third time and this time I pick it up.)

Me: “Hello, deli department. [My Name] speaking.”

Customer: “The other guy told me you close at eight. I know you close at ten.”

Me: “We used to close at ten. We are currently closing at eight. We were open later for summer but we are now closing at eight.”

Customer: “You should be open until ten!” *hangs up*

(The worst part was the customer was an employee from the front of the store!)

Page 937/3,040First...935936937938939...Last