Manners Go Down The Toilet

, | Stockholm , Sweden | Right | February 5, 2016

Me: “Hi, and welcome to [Establishment].”

Guest: “TOILET!”

Me: *with a slight bow* “Toilet to you too, sir.”

Crappy Handwriting

| NJ, USA | Right | February 5, 2016

(The customer buys her tickets with a credit card so I hand her my pen to sign the receipt. While she’s signing it…)

Customer: “Where is the bathroom? I just changed my daughter’s diaper and need to wash my hands.”

Me: “It’s right over there… and you can keep the pen.”

 

Dear readers! This story was originally submitted without a title, to encourage you to come up with a witty submission yourselves. After considering the many amazing suggestions in the comments section, we have come up with the title above. Thank you all for participating; we had a blast reading them!

Serving Donald Trump

| Portland, OR, USA | Right | February 5, 2016

(I work as a U-Scan attendant at a large grocery store. The company is currently running a promotion for a new line of Mexican food, which means we get to wear t-shirts that say “Taste of Mexico” on the front.)

Customer: “Why are you wearing all that Mexican stuff? We have enough Mexicans around here.”

Me: *walking away* “Oh… kay…”

A Perfect Hollywood Ending

| Redmond, WA, USA | Right | February 5, 2016

(I am shopping at a large, well known chain store and happen to pick up the last copy of a newly released DVD geared towards kids when I am approached by a frantic woman.)

Shopper: “Wait! Is that the last copy?”

Me: “Yeah. Sorry.”

(I turn to leave, stop, think for a second, and turn back around.)

Me: “Ma’am? Do you have kids at home?”

Shopper: “Yes, I do.” *motioning with her head to two boys behind her*

Me: “Take it. I can get a copy later.”

Shopper: “Are you sure? Thank you!”

Employee: *to me* “I need you to come with me for a minute.”

(He leads me to a stocking cart where he finds the actual last copy in stock.)

Me: “Awesome! That worked out well. Thanks!”

Employee: *very seriously* “Thank you for your generosity.”

(The look on all their faces made my day. Sometimes good karma pays off instantly!)

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Wireless, Clueless, Hopeless, Part 24

| Jacksonville, FL, USA | Right | February 5, 2016

(A customer walks in with a PSP he purchased recently from our store.)

Customer: “My PSP won’t connect to the Internet. Keeps giving me an error.”

Me: “Huh, weird. You have a good connection to your wifi right?”

Customer: “Wifi?”

Me: “Yeah, your wireless Internet. What’s the signal strength when you try to connect?”

(Customer looks at me like I’m from Mars.)

Me: “You do have Internet at home right?”

Customer: “No.”

Me: “Well, you need to have the Internet at home in order to be able to use the Internet.”

Customer: “I just thought the Internet came with the PSP when I bought it.”

 

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