I Didn’t Work Here, Does Not Work Here

| Langley, BC, Canada | Bad Behavior, Theme Of The Month

(I’m just shopping, when another customer comes by to ask me a question.)

Customer: “Hey, how much is this?”

Me: “I don’t know.”

Customer: “You don’t know?! You work here, don’t you?!”

Me: “No, I don’t work here.”

Customer: *muttering* “God-d*** it, no one f****** works here. Can’t find any god-d*** help anywhere.”

(The customer walks away, and I figure that is the end of that. Fast-forward a few months later: I need a job, and I just so happen to end up working for this very same store. On my first week I am feeling rather chipper and enthusiastic about helping customers.)

Me: “Hello, sir, is there anything I can help you with today?”

Customer: “I thought you didn’t work here! Were you being a lazy s*** back then?!”

(Yep. Same customer.)

Related:
I Don’t Work Here, Does Not Work Here, Part 16
I Don’t Work Here, Does Not Work Here, Part 15
I Don’t Work Here, Does Not Work Here, Part 14

Loading Up Goodwill

| Netanya, Israel | Home Improvement, Theme Of The Month

(I am a customer at a popular Swedish cheap furniture mega-chain. On this evening I have just finished exchanging a disassembled table I mistakenly bought for the model I wanted. While I am loading the new box into my car, an older lady asks me to help with her new furniture.)

Customer #1: “Excuse me, can you help me load this into my car?”

Me: “But of course!”

(As I load the woman’s furniture into her vehicle, a middle-aged man nearby sees me doing that and assumes that it is my job.)

Customer #2: “When you’re done there, can you come help me?”

Me: “Um, I don’t actually work here, but sure.”

Customer #2: “Oh, you don’t? I’m sorry.”

Me: “It’s no problem, I’ll help anyway.”

(I help the man load his car, and he hands me a coin.)

Customer #2: “Well here, take this for your trouble.”

(I got a tip of 5 shekels – about $1.3 – without even working there.)

Needs A Prescription Of Common Sense

| PA, USA | Crazy Requests, Health & Body, Theme Of The Month

(I work in the mail order branch of a popular pharmacy chain. On my way to work I stop by a local retail branch of the pharmacy to pick up a prescription. I happen to be wearing a company t-shirt which, while having the variant of the company name used by the mail order branch, is nothing at all like the uniforms worn by retail employees nor is it at all professional-looking. A woman comes up next to me while I’m waiting at the pharmacy counter.)

Customer: “Excuse me, where are allergy medicines?”

Me: *looking around* “Over there, I think.”

Customer: “What, don’t you know where things are in your own store?”

Me: “Oh, I don’t work here. I actually work at [Mail Order Branch] on [Road].”

Customer: “Oh, ok. So, which kind is safest for my son to use?”

Me: “Sorry?”

Customer: “Which allergy medicine is safest for my son? He’s ten.”

Me: “You would really have to ask a pharmacist.”

Customer: “But you said you work for [Company].”

Me: “I just package orders. I’m not a pharmacist.”

Customer: “So why are you at the pharmacy counter?”

Me: “I’m picking up a prescription…”

Customer: “So you can stand here but you can’t help a customer?”

(The pharmacy tech tells me my prescription is ready. I get it and pay, all while the woman stares at me. As I walk away the tech notices the woman standing behind me.)

Pharmacy Tech: “Can I help you?”

Customer: “I don’t know. Apparently no one else around here can!”