Consoling Himself With Lies

| MI, USA | Funny Names, Technology

(An older man comes in, looking perplexed.)

Me: “Sir, was there something I could help you find?”

Customer: “Yes, I’d like to get a PS3 but don’t have enough money. How much would I get for my Xbox?”

Me: “Is it an original Xbox, or an Xbox 360?”

Customer: “It’s just an Xbox 2.”

(I show him what the original Xbox and the Xbox 360 looks like.)

Customer: “I’m telling you, it’s the Xbox 2!”

Me: “I’m sorry but I don’t know what that is, so we cannot accept it on trade.”

(At this point he is clearly getting frustrated.)

Customer: “Well, do you take the PS2 or the Wii on trade?”

Me: “Yes, right now the original PS2 goes for $15 and the newer, slim model goes for $20. The Wii’s currently go for around $70.”

Customer: “Well good, ’cause you ain’t gettin’ mine!”

(He snickered to himself and left, convinced he had an Xbox 2.)

Sums Up The Point Quite Nicely

| PA, USA | At The Checkout, Math & Science, Money

(A customer comes up to my register ranting about how “Kids today don’t know math!” I’m in high school.)

Customer: “Kids today are just so ignorant! I’ll bet this girl here doesn’t even know any basic math!”

(She then starts quizzing me on mental math as I’m trying to ring out her order. By the grace of God, I get all of them right.)

Customer: “Well, I guess you’re the exception to the rule, then.”

(She then counts out her change for me.)

Me: “Ma’am?”

Customer: “Yes?”

Me: “Your total was $10.60. You only gave me $10.50. I think you miscounted.”

Customer: *embarrassed* “Oh.”

(She quickly recounts her change and leaves.)

Coworker: “That was the best thing ever.”

Smooth Out The Allergy Situation

| KS, USA | Extra Stupid, Food & Drink, Health & Body

Me: “Hiya! What can I do for you?”

Customer: “Yeah, I’d like to exchange this peanut butter.”

(She hands me the peanut butter and the receipt.)

Me: “Oh, okay. Any reason? Is it bad?”

Customer: “Oh, no, it’s not bad. It’s just that it’s the chunky kind, and I need creamy.”

Me: “Oh! Well, if you want to go grab the one you want, I’ll get you fixed up and on your way!”

(She goes and gets the creamy peanut butter and comes back. I check the prices and hand her the right one.)

Me: “All righty, you’re all set! Have a good day!”

Customer: “Thank you!” *laughs* “I can’t believe I picked this up. I can’t have the one with the chunks in it. I’m allergic to peanuts!”

(She walked off and my manager and I exchanged very confused glances.)