Done With This Business

| Australia | Bizarre, Food & Drink, Theme Of The Month

(I am second in line at a deli. Deli servers aren’t allowed to stop serving someone unless they’re absolutely sure a customer is done.)

Deli Worker: *to first customer* “That’s 500 grams. Is that all today?”

Customer: *playing with phone, says nothing*

Deli Worker: *turns, wraps the item, and hands it to the customer* “Is that all today?”

Customer: *not looking up, slowly walks away*

(The worker’s eyes follow the customer until she’s completely out of the line.)

Deli Worker: “Aaaaaand… that’s a yes.” *turns to me, mirroring my bemused face* “Hi.”

Just Grit Your Teeth And Smile

| MI, USA | Extra Stupid, Food & Drink, Theme Of The Month

Customer: *looking over a menu* “Anything on your menu can be made vegan, right?”

Me: “Well, most of it. Actually if it can be there will be a capital V next to the name.”

Customer: “So the grits are vegan?”

Me: “No, but they can be made vegetarian.”

Customer: “I’ll have the grits.”

Me: “They’re vegetarian, not vegan.”

Customer: “You’ve had the grits for awhile?”

Me: “Yes and they’re not vegan.”

Customer: “I’d like the grits.”

Me: *sighs*

A Text In The Wrong Direction

| Anaheim, CA, USA | Bad Behavior, Technology, Theme Of The Month

Customer: “Could you tell me how to get to [attraction in another area of the park]?”

Me: *gives detailed directions to the attraction*

Customer: “I’m sorry. I got a text while you were talking. Could you repeat that?”

Need To Reroute This Transaction

, | Hokes Bluff, AL, USA | Food & Drink, Theme Of The Month

(I hear my coworker, who is somewhat new, reading our entire list of drinks off to a customer over the speaker. I go over to see what is going on, and hear this.)

Customer: “I want a ‘route 44!'”

Coworker: “Yes, ma’am, and what would you like to drink?”

Customer: “A ‘route 44!'”

Coworker: “What kind? We have—” *reads off drinks again*

Customer: *angry* “A ‘ROUTE 44!'”

Coworker: *to me* “I don’t know what to do. She’s just not getting it.”

Me: *to Coworker* “They need you over there. I’ll take over here.” *to Customer* “Hi ma’am, what can I get you to drink with your order?”

Customer: “Oh, my god. I WANT A ‘ROUTE 44!'”

Me: “Yes, ma’am, but a route 44 what?”

Customer: *screaming* “A ROUTE 44 LARGE! I WANT A ROUTE 44 LARGE!”

Me: “Ma’am, route 44 is a size. What would you like to drink?”

Customer: *pauses, mutters something to another person in the car* “I want a route 44 Coke…”

Taking Action On The Distraction

, | Estado de México, Mexico | Awesome Workers, Food & Drink, Theme Of The Month

(I’m the customer in this story. I’ve come to the mall and on the way out I visit a stall that makes crêpes.)

Me: “Yeah, I’d like a ham with manchego one, please.”

Worker: *Inputs the order in the computer* “Would you like chipotle or jalapeño, sir?”

(I’ve wandered into my own thoughts and don’t listen.)

Worker: “Sir?”

Me: *snapping back* “Uh?”

Worker: “Chipotle or jalapeño, sir?”

Me: “Yes.”

(The worker stares at me awkwardly and then I realize what I just said.)

Me: “Sorry, sorry! Chipotle, please.”

(The rest of the transaction goes without any trouble and then they proceed to make the crêpe.)

Worker: “You tell me how much chipotle do you want, sir.”

(I look at her dabbing a little of the stuff and then adding more and more.)

Worker: “Uh… are you distracted again?”

Me: “Not this time. I just like it spicy.”

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