Bitter About The Caramel

| TX, USA | Right | October 27, 2015

(I work for a well-known coffee chain, and we have our fair share of crazy customers. One morning, a customer storms up to the counter where a relatively new coworker is running the register.)

Customer: “This is wrong! Remake this immediately!”

Coworker: “I’m sorry about that. Can you help me understand what you did want? I see here that we made you a white mocha with caramel.”

Customer: “I came through the drive through and I said I wanted caramel! You didn’t give me f****** caramel!”

Coworker: “I can fix that for you. Would you prefer caramel drizzle or the syrup?”

Customer: “I want caramel!” *she then thrusts the cup at my coworker, sending it skidding across the counter top* “There’s no caramel in my cup!”

Coworker: *opens the cup* “Oh, they put drizzle on here, instead of the syrup. I got you. Just a moment.”

Customer: “If you weren’t so f****** stupid and could do your f****** job right the first f****** time, I wouldn’t have to come back for such a stupid f****** reason!”

(At this point, I’m about to step in despite being tied up at the window, but my coworker bursts into tears and starts sniffling.)

Coworker: “I am genuinely sorry about this. Please, let me fix this for you. It won’t take but a minute—” *she goes to remake the drink, with the customer oddly quiet and hovering at the hand off* “—Here, please, taste this. I want you to be happy with your beverage.”

Customer: *takes the drink, takes a sip, shoves something into my coworker’s hand, and all but runs out the door*

Me: “Are you okay?”

Coworker: *turns to me, her eyes super red, sniffs once, and wrinkles her nose* “My allergies are wreaking havoc on my sinuses and eyes. Can I go take some medicine?”

Me: “You’re sure you’re fine?”

Coworker: *straight out grins* “Absolutely. I got us a five dollar tip! AND I gave her decaf!”

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Hanging With The Customers

| Australia | Right | October 27, 2015

(I volunteer for a charity second-hand store for a few months. One day a woman who is obviously in a bad mood walks into the store.)

Customer: “Do you sell your clothes racks?”

Me: “Ah, no, ma’am, we need them.”

Customer: “Those racks?” *points to racks where our clothing is hanging*

Me: “Yes, ma’am, we need them to hang our clothes on.”

Customer: “They sell them in Sydney.”

Me: “We aren’t Sydney, ma’am, and we need them to hang our clothing on.”

Customer: “I’m getting your manager!”

(My manager later told me about a crazy lady yelling at her because she wouldn’t sell the clothing racks to her!)

Unsanitary Behavior

| USA | Right | October 27, 2015

(I am checking out a woman’s prescriptions. She had just finished paying and signing for them when this happens.)

Customer: “Hey there is a big spot of something here on the counter.”

Me: “Oh, yeah, so there is. It’s probably someone who dripped some of the hand sanitizer from the bottle over there on the counter. But to be on the safe side I have some alcohol in a spray bottle and I will clean that right up.)

(I walk over to the other side of the counter grab the bottle and some paper towels to clean it up. When I get over there she had taken the pump out of the bottle of sanitizer and dumped almost the entire bottle on the counter and spread it over almost 2/3 of the counter. See looks at me all smiles.)

Customer: “There, all better. Nice and clean for you!”

(She then just walked away leaving me to have to clean up the GIANT puddle of goop off the counter.)

Weird And Cheered

| Saint Paul, MN, USA | Right | October 27, 2015

(I work for my university calling alum and asking for donations to the school. A child who sounds about five or six picks up.)

Kid: “Hello?”

Me: “Hi, may I please speak to [Alum]?”

Kid: *to mom* “Mom, there’s some weird lady on the phone for you.”

Alum: “Oh, my god, I am so sorry!”

Me: *laughing hysterically* “That brightened my entire day.”

Alum: “I’ll give him a talking-to later.”

Me: “No, no, I promise. It was adorable.”

No Bright Prospects For This Lamp

| WI, USA | Right | October 27, 2015

(My husband and I own a thrift shop and consignment store. People bring in items to us either for consignment or to sell us. A lady brings in “an antique lamp.”)

Customer: “I want to sell this lamp, and I expect $300 for it.”

Me: “Hmm, based on our local economy, if genuine, it will only sell for a fraction of that at the most. I can offer $40.”

Customer: *outraged* “It is the same kerosene lamp found in Gone With The Wind and it is worth way more than that!”

Me: “Then it is probably a replica, especially since, despite resembling an antique kerosene lamp, it has an electrical cord coming out of it.”

Customer: “An expert friend of mine appraised it for me and said it is genuine. It is worth a thousand, and I you will be making a huge mistake passing up this deal”

Me: “I am not saying I am an expert, but I doubt I could sell the lamp in my store for much more than I offered, and by all means, I can direct you to other reputable businesses.”

(She left in a huff. A week later, she returned with the lamp, humbly admitting the other businesses only offered her $20.)

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