The Price Is Right, Part 2

, , , , , | Right | October 16, 2020

I work in an independent charity shop benefitting a local charity. A lady has come in to donate some beautiful ornaments from a well-known and expensive designer.

Lady: “Please don’t sell these cheaply; they are very valuable.”

Me: “They are lovely. I’ll pop a note on for our manager; she will make sure they have the right price on them.”

Lady: “I just want to make sure you don’t sell them for next to nothing.”

Me: “Our manager will research them and put the right price on; please don’t worry. Thank you so much for donating them.”

As we’re speaking, a customer comes up with a pair of brand-new shoes, still with the original labels and price tags on, that we have priced at a third of the original price.

Customer: “These are really expensive. Why are they so dear?”

Me: “They are brand new; they’re actually at a huge discount.”

Customer: “But you’re a charity shop. This stuff is all donated; you get it for free! You should be selling it cheaply, not for prices like this!”

The lady does not even look at the customer but speaks up VERY loudly and clearly.

Lady: “I’m so glad you’re going to put a proper price on these ornaments. I spent a lot of money on them and I am so pleased they are going to make your charity a lot of money. I would be devastated if I came in and saw them with a silly low price on. I would rather sell them myself and just donate the money to you. Thank you for all the work your charity does; you deserve every penny people spend in this shop.”

She then turns round, looks at the customer, and glances at the shoes.

Lady: “Either pay the price or put them back. You should be ashamed.”

The very red-faced customer paid the full price without a word. You go, lady! I wish I could say exactly what you said.

The Price Is Right

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They Had A “Least Expensive” Education

, , , , , | Right | October 16, 2020

I work in a pack and ship store. I’ve just finished getting a customer’s shipping information. She’s been going on and on about not wanting to spend a lot of money on shipping.

Me: “All right, your least expensive shipping option is going to be—”

Customer:Hold up right there! I don’t want no ‘least expensive’! I want the cheapest!”

Me: “Okaaaay, the ‘cheapest’ I have is—”

Customer: “—and you’d better give me the cheapest! I don’t want no least expensive; you’d better not give me least expensive!

Me: “Oh, no, ma’am, I won’t. The cheapest is [price].”

Customer: “Good girl! Good listening! I’ll take it! No ‘least expensive’ for me!

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Very Illicit Passes

, , , | Right | October 16, 2020

A group of friends and I attend a local anime convention annually, so I generally preorder our tickets to save time and money. Conveniently enough, we have just enough people to qualify for their smallest group package, which I think is to blame for what happens one particular year.

We all arrive at the venue and I head off to collect our tickets.

Staffer: “Name for the order and ID?”

I answer and hand it over.

Staffer: “Okay… so you’ve got the [group package]?”

I nod.

Staffer: “Great! Here are your weekend passes… And here are your bags. Inside you’ll find your VIP passes, T-shirt voucher, and signature vouchers. Keep both passes on you for all events!”

VIP passes? We didn’t order a VIP package. There’s clearly been a mistake! So, naturally, I do the only responsible thing. I thank the staffer, take the passes and bags, and quickly, but calmly, exit the scene to find my friends.

Me: *Handing out the passes* “All right, everybody, here’s your weekend pass. And here’s your bag with your VIP pass.”

Friend #1: “I didn’t think we bought VIP passes?”

Me: “We didn’t. Which is why we’re all going to be on our absolute best behavior this weekend.”

Friend #2: “Ohhh. Gotcha!”

That ended up being the start of the most crazy blessed convention weekend we’ve ever had, and we fully intend to properly buy VIP passes going forward, because it’s absolutely worth the upgrade!

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More Than He Bargained For, Part 2

, , , , , | Right | October 16, 2020

At a charity fundraising, I am browsing books and a man comes up and also looks through the selection. It is fifty cents a book, or four books for a dollar. He comes up with a selection of five and he speaks to the woman running the stall.

Customer: “Can I get these five for a dollar?”

Stall Owner: “No, the price is four for a dollar. Maybe later in the day when we’re down to the remnants.”

He uses every tactic he could: first customer of the day, get things moving, the books aren’t in great condition, and so on. Eventually, she relents and lets him have them.

Customer: “Great! I love bargaining, and I absolutely love getting a bargain!”

He hands over a $20.

Stall Owner: “I’m sorry. It’s so early in the day; I don’t have change for that.”

Customer: “Oh, no worries. Keep the change. The charity’s for a good cause.”

And off he went on his happy way!

More Than He Bargained For

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Unable To Mask Their Ignorance, Part 2

, , , , | Right | October 16, 2020

Masks are mandatory in our store. This shift, there have only been a few people that needed to be reminded to wear their mask over their nose, as well, and those were mostly because they’d slid down naturally.

A man comes in, or tries to, anyway. I glance up from what I’m doing to greet him and I have to double-take. We make eye contact and he stops in his tracks. I can tell that he knows exactly what he’s doing wrong.

I just look at him, raise an eyebrow and, since my boss has told me to not accept any nonsense related to the health-crisis-based government regulation, I say:

Me: “Nice try. Get out.” 

He sulked away. 

Instead of a mask, he had a hand slapped over his nose and mouth. 

How he had made it past security and into the mall in the first place, I don’t know.

Unable To Mask Their Ignorance

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