Someone Will Scream For The Wrong Ice Cream

| London, England, UK | Crazy Requests, Food & Drink, Spouses & Partners, Top

(A customer comes in, looking a little tired. I’m stacking shelves.)

Customer: “Hi, I need some vanilla Häagen-Dazs. Where are your freezers?”

Me: “They’re over here, but I’m afraid I think we’re out of Häagen-Dazs. We have our own brand vanilla.”

(He gives me a look like he’s going to cry.)

Customer: “I’m really sorry. It has to be Häagen-Dazs. It has to be vanilla.” *voice cracking* “Do you know where I could get some?”

(I promised to go and check the store room as he genuinely looked like he was about to burst into tears and I thought maybe he wasn’t very well. Luckily, we had a couple left that hadn’t been brought out. I brought it back and handed it to him. He looks at it like it’s magical, breathes a huge sigh of relief, and heads to the check out. He picks up a mini chocolate cake on the way and I see him talk to my colleague behind the counter. After he’s gone, she comes over to me and hands me the cake.)

Coworker: “That guy just said this is for you. He said he’s going home to his eight-month pregnant monster wife and because of you he’s not going to be murdered tonight.”

Transcending Bigotry

| Yorkshire, England, UK | Awesome Workers, Health & Body, Top

(I am in a bank after losing my purse, looking visibly distressed, in the queue after dealing with a customer service agent that was no help.)

Bank Teller: “May I help you, sir?”

Me: “I’m sorry, but I’m not a ‘sir.'”

Bank Teller: “Oh. Do you mind if… I… uh…”

Me: “Ask if I’m transgender?”

Bank Teller: “Yes.”

Me: “Yes, I am. I have just lost all my cards, and I can’t get replacements issued, because they’re saying I’m not who I say I am.”

Bank Teller: “That’s fine. Someone I’m close to faces similar issues to you. If you can just confirm some security details, I can get you some new cards and give you some money from your account.”

Me: “Brilliant, thank you.”

(After confirming my details:)

Bank Teller: “I have an idea; I could place a note on your account. It may not help, but next time you could mention that if they look in the customer notes that you are a transgender person. Here:” *shows me some text on the screen*

Me: “That’s perfect. Thank you.”

Bank Teller: “No worries. You shouldn’t be faced with more problems when you’re already having a bad day.”

(Thank you, anonymous bank teller. You restored my faith in humanity!)

Taking Truth Down To The Wire

| WI, USA | Extra Stupid, Technology, Theme Of The Month

(When our store first started using spiderwire (an alarmed wire wrapped around packaging) we weren’t allowed to tell people what is was, for whatever reason. When asked, I would just say it is a security device. I am pressed on how it works by one belligerent customer:)

Me: “This is a sophisticated anti-theft system we’ve just invested in. If one leaves the store it will automatically engage the alarm and trigger the GPS tracking. We then relay the information to the police. It’s so we can not only stop theft, but bust thieves in their own homes.”

(The customer’s mouth was open with shock.)

Customer: “I didn’t realize [Store] was capable of that!”

(He then set his item wrapped in wire down slowly and literally ran out of the store.)

I Say Tomato, You Say Theft

| CA, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Criminal & Illegal, Money

(As a cashier one of biggest pet peeves is when people eat the items before paying for them.)

Me: “Hi. How are you today?”

(I instantly notice customer has three boxes of tomatoes, and is eating away.)

Customer: “Hi…” *continues eating one of the boxes of tomatoes*

Me: *scans all three boxes* “Your total is [total].”

(The customer, still chewing away, swipes her card.)

Me: “This card was declined.”

Customer: “Can I try again?”

(There are only two tomatoes left in box she ate from. She swipes the card again.)

Me: “It was declined.”

Customer: “Let me try another card.” *swipes card*

Me: “That was declined also.”

Customer: “Let me just go to the ATM to get cash. I’ll be right back.”

(The customer never came back and got away with eating almost an entire box of tomatoes for free.)

Your Explanation Has Been Declined

| Colorado Springs, CO, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Money

(We are in the middle of a huge rush where all of the lines are full. We were trying to get customers out as quickly as possible. This customer has only a few items and her total is about $12. She slides her card, and it is declined. I always try to be polite and couth about it when this happens.)

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am. It didn’t like your card. Would you like to try it again?”

Customer: “What do you mean?”

Me: “The register didn’t want to take your card. You can try running it again, though, if you want.”

Customer: “Does this happen a lot?”

Me: “It happens sometimes.”

Customer: *suddenly angry and much louder* “This is ridiculous! You need to fix this! It’s such an inconvenience! This always happens to me at this store! You need to fix your card reader!”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but it’s not the reader. It read your card just fine but the purchase didn’t go through.”

Customer: “No! This is terrible customer service! Type it in on your machine!”

Me: “I can’t do that, ma’am. Our system won’t let us and we aren’t allowed. It read your card just fine. It just wasn’t approved.”

Customer: “Why not?! I know I have money on this card! It’s your fault and you have to do something about this!”

Me: “It really isn’t an issue with the card reader or with our system at all. If you want I can suspend this and you can contact your bank to find out what’s going on.”

Customer: “H***, no! I’m not waiting in line again!” *starts fishing money out of her wallet* “This is ridiculous! Get me your manager! You need to fix your machine!”

Me: “Ma’am, it really isn’t mine or the machine’s fault. The problem lies with your card.”

Customer: “No, it doesn’t! I know I have money in this account!”

Me: “I’m sorry. I don’t know what the issue is. You can try contacting your ba—”

Customer: “No! What does your screen say?”

Me: “It says it was declined, ma’am.”

(The customer then turned beet red and threw money at me, then gathered up her things and went over to the manager. She yelled at him about how I was rude and embarrassed her by saying her card was declined in front of other customers. My manager never talked to me about it, though, and the next three customers in line all told me to keep my chin up and hang on, and hoped that my shift was almost over. It was, thankfully.)

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