A Grape Way To Deal With Customers

| Calgary, AB, Canada | Food & Drink, Money

Me: *answering phone* “Good evening, this is [Grocery Store]. How may I help you?”

Customer: “Hi, my husband was in earlier and I find it hard to believe that the grapes he bought were so expensive! I think they were weighed incorrectly.”

Me: “Oh, well, if you would be able to come into the store, I can re-weigh them for you and correct for any price discrepancy.”

Customer: “Uh… I have to come in? Ugh.” *hangs up*

Me: *staring confusedly at the phone* “How else does she expect a price change to work?”

Being Foggy With The Specifics

| USA | Time, Transportation

(I receive a phone call from an airline dispatcher regarding a weather forecast. Why he’s calling the air traffic control tower and not the weather service is beyond me but I think I may have solved that issue for good.)

Airline Dispatcher: “What time is the fog going to lift?”

Me: *busy and tired of dealing with the inane* “9:47.”

Airline Dispatcher: *after a short pause* “Wow, that’s pretty specific. Are you sure?”

Me: “I’d bet your life on it.”

Should Have Done The Scan For Leftover Customers

| Australia | Crazy Requests, Health & Body

(We close on Saturdays at 12 pm. It is 11:55 am and the last patient has left. I lock the doors and settle everything. The radiographer turns the machines off. I have my bag in my hand. It is now 12 pm.)

Customer: “Hello.”

(I look around alarmed. A woman slowly walks up to me.)

Me: “Ah, hello.”

Customer: “I saw Dr [Name] today and he said I can have an X-ray today.”

(I recall a call from Dr Name at 11 am and a patient stating the same thing arrived. I had no idea there was more than one.)

Me: “Yes, that was at eleven. When did you get here?”

(And how did she get through the locked doors?)

Customer: “I’ve been here since 11:30; I’ve just been in the bathroom.”

(The radiographer sees and gives me a panicked ‘everything is turned off already’ look and stands beside me.)

Me: “I’m so sorry. We just closed. I was expecting you earlier. We can do Monday, definitely!”

Customer: “The doctor said you can do me today.”

Me: “And we could have if you came up before closing. Unfortunately, we have turned off the X-ray machine and are unable to do any more scans.”

Customer: “My doctor said you would do it today! It’s urgent; I don’t know what’s wrong with me.”

Radiographer: “Even if we scanned you today there are no reports because we have no radiologist on the weekends.”

(The radiographer continued repeating what I was saying in every polite way as I notice Customer #2 at the front struggling with the door. She waves me over. I open the door a crack seeing she is distressed.)

Customer #2: “My doctor called and said you would do my scan for me!”

Me: “Unfortunately, we closed at 12 pm. All calls I got were around 11 am.”

Customer #2: “I need the scan done! He said you’re going to do it!”

(She grabs the door and tries to push it open, but my foot is lodged behind it and it doesn’t budge. Shocked at the aggression, I repeat once again we are closed and shut the door. She walks away in a huff. I return to the first customer.)

Me: “If it’s urgent I know the emergency department always has scanning available with reporting.”

(Customer #1 left, defeated. The radiographer and I sighed and headed home at 12:20 pm. Funny how every time I mention to patients that the emergency department is available after hours their scan is suddenly not as urgent.)

Did Nazi That Coming

TX, USA | At The Checkout, Crazy Requests, Popular, Religion

(I work in a gas station located on a major interstate, and we get a lot of out-of-town customers who are just passing through. Many of them object to the company’s policy of requiring customers to pre-pay for gas.)

Customer #1: “I want to fill up with gas, but I want to buy drinks, too. Can you just hold my card and turn on the pump?”

Me: “No, sir, I’m sorry; company policy does not allow me to do that, in the event that a card may be declined.”

Customer #1: “My card is good. Just turn on the pump.”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir. I’m not allowed to do that. You will have to use your card to pay at the pump and come in to purchase your drinks separately.”

Customer #1: “This is bull-s***! Why should I have to make two separate purchases? You just like telling people what to do! You’re a god-d*** [Gas Station] Nazi!” *continues ranting and cursing, using the word “Nazi” at least four more times*

Customer #2: *in line behind Customer #1* “That will be enough of that, young man.”

(Customer #1 rounds on Customer #2, obviously preparing to continue his tirade. Customer #2, an elderly lady wearing a necklace with a large silver Star of David pendant, looks back at him calmly as his mouth shuts with a snap. Without looking at either of us again, he slinks off and drives away.)

Me: “I’m so sorry about that, ma’am.”

Customer #2: “Quite all right, miss. Twenty dollars on pump two, please.”

Me: “Thank you, and have a lovely day!”

Customer #2: “Shalom!”

His Haggling Has Rooms For Improvement

| IL, USA | Hotels & Lodging, Money, Popular

(I work as a front desk clerk at a mid/low range hotel it was about mid-shift but my boss who usually takes over for me is there. Two customers come in, both old men.)

Customer: “Here is my coupon. I have AAA and AARP and I am also a veteran.”

Me: “Sir, you may only use one discount per room.”

Customer: “Well, if you come with the room, I’ll take it.”

Me: *said with a straight face* “Sir, if you need all those discounts to this hotel then you can not afford me.”

Customer’s Friend: *as he laughs* “You’ve lost your touch, old man.”