That’s Still More Than Trump Gives Back

, , , , | Right | August 11, 2017

(I work at a popular restaurant in Las Vegas. We get a diverse group of people from different cultural and political backgrounds. This particular day is like any other, until this exchange occurs:)

Customer: *wearing a ‘Make America Great Again’ hat* “I’m only going to give you a 10% tip because you didn’t do a great job.”

Me: “I’m sorry, did I do something wrong?”

Customer: “Oh, no, no, not at all. You were fine; you just weren’t great. Have a nice day!”

Me: “All right, we’ll see you next time.” *quietly, to myself* “Next time I’ll make table-side service great again…”

The Shopping Dead

, , , | Right | August 11, 2017

(I am a fitting room attendant at a big box store. A customer comes in to try on some clothes. The customer is putting the items back into her cart when a coworker comes along. The customer’s back is to us. Coworker accidentally bumps into her.)

Coworker: “I’m so sorry.”

(The customer doesn’t respond.)

Coworker: “How are you doing today? Are you finding everything okay?”

(The customer doesn’t respond. A few minutes after that customer has left:)

Coworker: “She was rude.”

Me: “I think she was deaf.”

Coworker: “Oh.”

American Sniping Comments

, , , , , | Right | August 11, 2017

(It is opening night of “American Sniper” and we we’re playing it in our biggest theater as well as some other smaller theaters to offer more showtimes. We had our 7:45 show sell out at 7:00 pm so we quickly canceled other movies to be able to add showtimes at 8:10 pm and 8:30 pm. A guest arrives at 8:00 pm expecting to still have seats available for the 7:45 pm.)

Guest: “Is there a reason you are only playing this movie in tiny theaters?”

Coworker: “Well, sir, we are also playing it in larger theaters but to make room for more people we had to put it in smaller theaters.”

Guest: “This is ridiculous. It’s up for an Academy.”

Coworker: “Sir, I would be happy to switch you to a later showtime in a bigger theater.”

Guest: “I want to see it now in a big theater.”

(He continues to complain for a while before deciding not to see it at all.)

Other Guest: “I am so sorry people are a**-holes. Thank you for adding showtimes. We really appreciate how much you do for your guests!”

Your Ink Or Your Life

, , , , | Right | August 11, 2017

(There are usually a few days every winter where most stores in our mall close early due to bad winter weather. On this day, we close the store at three pm as the blowing snow has already caused many accidents, which then closes many main roads out of and into town. We close before it gets dark for the safety of our staff who would otherwise have to drive home or into work in the dark. Many other stores in the mall also close at three pm or even earlier that day. We have a sign on the door apologizing about being closed, and I have just let out the last customer and locked the doors, when a lady comes and yells at me through the doors.)

Customer: “WHAT?! ARE YOU SERIOUS?!”

Me: “Yes, sorry, we closed 10 minutes ago because of the weather.”

Customer: “ARE YOU SERIOUS?! I NEED INK!”

Me: “I’m sorry.”

Customer: “ALL I NEED IS INK! JUST LET ME GET MY INK!”

Me: “We’ve already taken all the tills off. I’m sorry.”

Customer: “THIS IS RIDICULOUS! CLOSING BECAUSE OF THE WEATHER! I CAN’T BELIEVE THIS!”

(She storms off, swearing.)

Me: *to myself* “It’s snowing so bad out you can’t even see across the road, but yes, it’s ridiculous not to expect people to drive in that for a minimum wage job. Sure.”

(My manager who lived out of town didn’t even drive home that night; she stayed in a hotel across the street.)

Closing Time Really Sets Them On Fire

, , , | Right | August 11, 2017

(About five minutes before we’re scheduled to close, we notice smoke coming from the back office, so we evacuate the building and call 911. A car pulls up and parks a few minutes later while the fire department is inside. A man gets out, and begins walking toward the building.)

Man: “Looks like there’s something going on at [Restaurant], huh?”

Manager: “Yeah. We had a small fire tonight, but it’s under control and nobody was hurt.”

(He breezes past us, toward the door of the restaurant.)

Manager: “Sir! What are you doing?”

Man: “I was just going to swing into [Restaurant] for dinner really quickly.”

Manager: “You can’t go in there, sir.”

Man: “I don’t need to mess with the fire. I just want a sandwich.”

Manager: “There’s nobody in there to serve you. We’re all out here.” *she motions to the group of us, all in shirts with the restaurant’s logo on it* “We evacuated the building because it was on fire.”

Man: “But you said it was under control now! What if I gave you my money, and you went in, made my sandwich, and brought it back out to me?”

Manager: “We closed fifteen minutes ago. Even if nothing had happened and we were all inside, you still wouldn’t be able to come in, because we’d be closed.”

Man: “That’s bull-s**t; you guys just don’t want to make my food! I’ll take my business to [Competitor].”

Manager: “And they’ll let you in, because not only are they still open, but their building is also not currently on fire.”

(The man stormed back to his car, swearing to never come to our restaurant again, and sped off in a huff.)

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