When The NAR Reader Becomes The NAR Customer

, , , | Right Working | March 24, 2019

(I’m the customer in this one. This site has made me paranoid. I’m at a donut shop, getting a coffee and a donut. The clerk goes to the display and grabs a donut that’s very similar to the one I ordered.)

Clerk: “Is this one you ordered?”

(It’s close enough, and I don’t want to raise a fuss.)

Me: “Yeah, fine. Whatever.”

(The manager decides to step in.)

Manager: “Hold on a minute, [Clerk]. We’ve been getting a lot of complaints lately because you keep getting [donut I ordered] confused with [donut she grabbed]. Are you sure that’s what he ordered?”

Clerk: “Yes, I am. I even checked with him.” *turns to me* “You ordered [donut she grabbed], right?”

Me: “Umm… actually, I ordered [donut I ordered].”

Clerk: “What? Why didn’t you say anything?”

Me: “I didn’t want to look like one of those idiot customers you read about on the Internet.”

A Conversation So Painful It Needs A Band-Aid

, , , , | Right | March 24, 2019

(I’m working the front register at a pharmacy when an elderly man comes up to my lane with two boxes of band-aids.)

Customer: “The sign says if I buy two of these I’ll get a free first-aid kit.”

Me: “Oh, I actually haven’t had a customer ask about that promotion before. Let me check with a coworker and see where the kits are.”

(I go and ask the closest coworker.)

Me: “Apparently the first-aid kits are kept at the pharmacy checkout, right at the back of the store. So you can go ahead and take your—“

Customer: “No, they sent me over here. They had me walk all the way over here because they said YOU had them!”

Me: “Hmm, I’m not sure. Let me call my manager up…”

(The manager arrives.)

Manager: “I’m so sorry for this confusion, sir. We actually ran out of the first-aid kits a little while ago. Unfortunately, we do not have one we can give you.”

Customer: “Are you serious? Fine, put these ones back, then.” *he hands me one of the two boxes and I put it in our put-backs bin*

Manager: “I know, I’m sor—“

Customer: “You should give me these other ones for free, then!”

Manager: “I’m sorry, sir, we can’t do that.”

Customer: “Why not?! I don’t even want these; I was only getting them for the first-aid kit! These don’t even WORK! I bought them before; I have to TAPE the band-aids onto my skin because they don’t STICK!”

([Manager] and I kinda look at each other like “you know we don’t make the band-aids, right?”)

Manager: “That sounds really frustrating. Unfortunately, we do not manufacture these products and can’t really do anything about how they work. I’m sorry, but we can’t just give you a product for free.”

Customer: “All I wanted was this d*** first-aid kit! I don’t even want these bandages!” *he turns to speak to the next customer in line, a middle-aged woman he clearly doesn’t know* “Do YOU want a band-aid?!”

Woman: “Er… no, thank you.”

Customer: “SEE!”

Manager: “Okay, okay, tell you what.” *she grabs a little bag, puts the band-aids in it, and hands them to the customer* “You’re all set, sir. I’m so sorry for this hassle.”

Customer: “That’s all you had to do.”

(My manager walked away, and interestingly enough, before the customer actually left he talked to me in a significantly-less-angry voice for a few moments, telling me how it wasn’t my fault, I hadn’t done anything wrong, I handled it fine, etc. Most intense and strangest customer interaction I’ve ever had…)

Common Sense Has Expired

, , , , | Right | March 23, 2019

(I work at a popular pharmacy/health store chain. The company policy used to be that we would take any store coupon even years after their expiration date, but at the end of last August the entire company changed the policy so that coupons did, in fact, expire at the written date and we were not allowed to override them for any reason, even one day later. Almost an entire year later, this sort of interaction still happens at least once every time I work. A customer hands me a coupon that expired several months ago.)

Me: “I’m sorry, this coupon actually expired back in [Month] and I won’t be able to apply it to this purchase. Would you like me to throw it out for you?”

Customer: “What? Your coupons never expire!”

Me: “There actually was a company-wide policy change, way over our heads, at the end of last August. We used to take expired coupons, but we’re not allowed to anymore. I’m sorry.”

Customer: “That’s ridiculous. You can never keep track of these. I’ve been meaning to use them for weeks, and now you’re telling me you can’t?”

Me: “Again, I’m really sorry. I know it can get confusing because we used to be able to take them, but it’s been almost a year now and I really can’t do anything about it.”

Customer: “You know that’s illegal?!”

Me: “I’m sorry, I just have to follow the company policies.”

Customer: “Fine, whatever. You’re not in charge. Sure, throw it out, and these, too.” *hands me a handful of other coupons, most of which have not yet expired*

Me: “You still have [time] to use these other ones!”

Customer: “I’ll just lose them or there’ll be some other problem. What’s the point!?”

The Signature Of Someone Who Really Needs Their Food

, , , , , | Right | March 23, 2019

(I work as a delivery driver for a café. My hat, shirt, and car all have the company name and logo. I pull up to a customer’s house and knock on the door, holding a bag of food that also has the company name on it.)

Me: “Hello! If I could just get your signature right here on your receipt, that would be great!”

Customer: “There’s no soliciting here! You need to leave right now!” *slams door in my face*

Me: *knocks again*

Customer: *opens door to yell at me again*

Me: “Ma’am, I’m from [Company]. I have your food order.”

Customer: “Oh!” *signs paper, takes food, doesn’t tip*

Just Can’t Stomach The Thought

, , , , | Right | March 23, 2019

(I’m assisting an elderly lady who’s nice but very chatty. As I’m ringing her up, she suddenly asks:)

Customer: “So when is your baby due? Are you pregnant?”

Me: “Um… no, I’m not.”

(I am short and curvy, and wearing a wrap dress with an empire waist, which is a common maternity style; I figured that’s why she assumed that. The customer looks a little embarrassed, and I kindly change the topic. After she leaves, I go over to tell my two coworkers, and we all laugh about it.)

Me: “I hear this happens all the time to women in retail, but this is my first. Check that off the list! I’m kind of reconsidering this dress, though.”

Coworker #1: “Oh, gosh, I was helping this lady in my line, and she fumbled and her hand kind of smacked against my stomach. I was about to tell her it was fine, but she freaked out and started yelling ‘Oh, no, I bumped the baby! Is the baby okay?!'”

(For the record, [Coworker #1] has no curves at all, and is very skinny.)

Me: “Seriously?!”

Coworker #1: “I didn’t really know what to say! I kind of joked that maybe I needed to go running after my shift, but the people in line behind her all told me after ‘Oh, no, you’re fine. You don’t need to do that.'”

Coworker #2: “Maybe they all thought you were pregnant and didn’t want you to run with the baby.”

Coworker #1: “Oh, God… I didn’t even think of that!”

(Free advice: even if it seems obvious to you that someone is pregnant, it’s best not to assume or bring it up. It prevents a lot of awkwardness in the long run.)

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