Thank God They Didn’t Watch Total Recall

| Right | November 3, 2007

Customer: “Do you have that book from that movie Les Miserababah?”

Me:Les Miserables? Yes it would be on the 3rd floor.”

Customer: “What section would it be in?”

Me: “The fiction section.”

Customer: “So nonfiction is true, and fiction is not true, right?”

Me: “Yes.”

Customer: “How can this book be fiction if there is a movie about it?”

Me: “Movies are not true.”

Customer: “Really?”

Me: “Yes. Movies are not true, movies are fiction.”

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Surprisingly, This One Knows How To Read

| Right | November 3, 2007

Library Patron: “Do you guys have books?”

Me: (I turn and give a side glance to the shelves of books on my right) “Nope. It’s all online.”

Source

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Gone, As In Mentally

, , | Right | November 3, 2007

Lady: “Yeah, I just got back so I missed the big rain storm.”

Me: “Well, it wasn’t too bad. Where did you go? Out of town?”

Lady: “What?”

Me: “You got back from somewhere. Where did you go?”

Lady: “I haven’t been anywhere.”

Me: “So you were here for the rainstorm?”

Lady: “No, I was gone.”

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One Track Minds And Earwax Don’t Mix

, , , | Right | November 3, 2007

Me: “What size?”

Lady: “Electric Lime.”

Me: “What size?”

Lady: “Electric Lime.”

Me: “That’s a color, miss. What size did you want the harness in?”

Lady: “What do you mean, ‘What size’?”

Me: “How many inches is it?”

Lady: “Oh I didn’t even think about the size.”

*grimace*

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Of Course, If You Really Want To Pay …

, | Right | November 2, 2007

Hotel Guest: “So how does parking work at the hotel?”

Me: “Oh, sir, parking is complimentary anywhere on site.”

Hotel Guest: “How much does it cost?”

Me: “It’s complimentary… It’s free.”

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