Heli-dum, Part 2

, , , | Right | June 2, 2020

I work in a craft shop. We sell balloons that we can fill with helium for an extra charge. I’m serving on the tills when two women come to my register. One is buying a pack of balloons. 

Me: “Hi there. Do you need the balloons filled with helium today?”

Customer: “No, I don’t see the point. If I just blow them up myself they’ll have air in them, so they’ll be light and float anyway.”

The lady’s friend and I then spent five minutes explaining why this wouldn’t work. Not sure we got through to her, as she didn’t buy the helium.

Related:
Heli-dum

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Can’t Quite Tap It Into Their Heads

, , , , , | Right | June 2, 2020

I work in a liquor store, usually during afternoon and evening hours. A lot of the customers are tradespeople who stop by the store on their way home from work and are generally tired from a long day. I’m often lucky to get more than one-word answers, even though I’m a pretty chirpy person!

Our store offers cash out with any purchase, but you have to insert or swipe your card to do it, or else it doesn’t work. A customer walks up to the counter with a six-pack of beers.

Me: “G’day, mate, just those ones tonight?”

Customer: “Yep. Card.”

I ring up the transaction through the card machine and wait for them to put it through.

Customer: “Oh, can I get $40 cash out?”

To make any changes, I have to cancel the transaction and put it through the card machine again. I do, and I add $40 to the cash-out option.

Me: “Right on. Insert or swipe when you’re ready.”

Customer: *Taps*

I clench my jaw. It always takes a few seconds for the card machine to decline, but it’s an agonising wait until it does. It declines.

Me: “Sorry, you’ve got to insert or swipe for cash out.”

The customer stands wordlessly, looking down at the card machine, card in hand. I ring the transaction through again. They insert the card and slowly type in the PIN. This time, it goes through. I hand the $40 across the counter.

Me: “Okay, awesome. Need a receipt with that tonight?”

Customer: “Nope.”

Me: “Okay, well, have an awesome night!”

They start walking out.

Customer: “Yep.”

I try in vain to un-clench my jaw. This sort of interaction can happen multiple times a night.

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Vegas Starts In London

, , , | Right | June 2, 2020

I’ve boarded a flight from London to Las Vegas — about ten hours flying time. I do this flight fairly frequently, so I am prepared; my meal is requested in advance, which of course means it comes to my numbered seat, and I have the flight essentials on my person, which include noise-cancelling headphones.

A group of women boards the flight and immediately, the noise level kicks up. One of the group starts asking all of the people around me if they are travelling alone, and if so, will they switch seats with one of their party so they can all sit together? This behaviour makes my blood boil, as most of the rest of the flight likely did everything by the book and now people are being hassled by this woman and her friends to move. They’re not being polite; they are being wheedling and irritating.

The woman gets to me to ask if I will move, but the passenger next to me sees the look on my face and jumps in.

Passenger: “We’re all together, sorry!”

Me: “Thanks for that. She was really getting on my nerves, and I can’t move easily, anyway, as my meal is coming to this seat.”

The ringleader of the group then does not stop talking in her elevated volume for most of the flight, including sharing a story about how she was on a flight once and a woman asked her if she would swap seats with her young son, so they could sit together. This clueless goon went on about how the woman should have planned ahead. Yes, really.

Another passenger eventually complains about the noise coming from this one empty vessel, and the stewardess speaks with her. This prompts the woman to speak even louder about this injustice, and how awful it is that some other passenger complained about her. She starts canvassing those around her — strangers — for support, asking if she has been loud on the flight. She gets to me.

Gobby Woman: “Excuse me, have I been loud on this flight? Have you been able to hear me? Only, the stewardess said someone complained about me and, you see, I’m hard of hearing, so I sometimes speak a little louder than normal and—”

I speak in my normal voice.

Me: “I’ve been watching movies the entire flight, with the volume turned up, wearing noise-cancelling headphones, and I have heard every word you have said. EVERY. WORD.”

She looked stunned and sat back and finally shut up for a while.

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Old Scam Mismanaged

, , , , , | Right | June 2, 2020

I am the acting manager on the floor. My general manager will often come to work on the weekends so he can be aware of how all shifts are running. During these times, he allows whichever manager-on-duty is scheduled to continue to act as manager while he works as a team member, working whatever position he needs to and deferring to us for decisions. My manager has worked all shifts all days of the week and knows all the regulars by name.

This particular Saturday, I am acting manager-on-duty while my general manager works the front register. A lady came running in with one of our cups.

Customer: “I just came through the drive-thru and my latte has froth on it! I’m here all the time and you always get it wrong!”

Outside the fact that a latte always has foam on it unless a customer specifically asks for no foam, this is a woman I have never seen before and, by the look on his face, my manager hasn’t, either.

Manager: “Well, ma’am—”

He can’t get anything else in edgewise as the woman keeps ranting, so he finally just waits for her to finish. She ends with:

Customer: “I am a regular here and this is ridiculous! I personally know the manager and will see you all fired.”

I look at my manager curiously, waiting to see what he does. He sighs.

Manager: “Actually, ma’am, I am the general manager at this location, and I have never seen you before.”

At this, the lady became very red and left quickly. My manager, the other workers, and I all burst out laughing.

Moral of the story: if you are going to play the “I know the manager!” card, make sure you aren’t talking TO the manager!

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23 Times When Having To Work Overtime Should Have Been A Crime

| Right | June 2, 2020

Dear readers,

Today is Leave the Office Earlier Day! This day was invented by Laura Stack, a specialist in employee productivity. She noted that working longer hours and overtime is actually detrimental to productivity! The US works about 350 hours more a year than their European counterparts, so she decided that a day to leave early was required!

Now 2020 is proving to be a weird year for workers, but that still doesn’t mean you can’t less your boss know what today is, and maybe take a longer lunch break for yourself if you can! If you do get some more time today, we hope you can use it to enjoy the 23 stories selected from our archives, of demanding bosses, lazy coworkers, and oblivious customers who do not respect a decent work/life balance!

 

Okay, That Was A Little Mean – Mean it may be, but this is soooo satisfying to read!

Overtime Crime – We’re pretty sure a federal court would love to hear about what’s happening here.

Dads: Gotta Love ‘Em – Remaining calm in the face of their ever-increasing fury is a joy to behold.

Off The Clock, Customer Block, Part 2 – Making them sound like a jerk is easy because they are.

Overtime Crime, Part 2 – There’s a reason why our ‘Overtime Crime’ title became a series…

Replacing A Labor Coach With A Labor Couch – Nothing screams work/life balance like labor pains!

Overtime Crime, Part 3 – We were hoping this series could end on a trilogy. How wrong we were…

Don’t Commit The Crime If You Can’t Do The Overtime – So this is what happens when you go from a sweatshop to a real place of work!

Mourning The Morning – Some people are just not morning people.

Overtime Crime, Part 4 – When the boss is hoping the two-hour movie has a one-hour intermission.

The Key To Avoiding Overtime – If you have to SNEAK OUT to avoid mandatory overtime, something has gone horribly wrong.

A Storm Of Protest – We’d like you to risk your life for a minimum-wage job by driving in a blizzard. KTHXBYE!

Overtime Crime, Part 5 – The important thing is the manager got home to his hot dinner – nothing else matters!

A Professor That Gives You The Time Of Day – “For the love of Sagan” – read this story!

Dress Down For Lunch Or You’ll Get A Good Dressing – When a lunch break is purely theoretical.

Overtime Crime, Part 6 – The store can’t be run without overtime. The store cannot afford overtime. You see where this is going…

This Extra Working Just Isn’t Working – The cold coffee is just the icing on the cake.

A Weak Week Off – Notarizing still counts in pajamas, right?

Overtime Crime, Part 7 – Sometimes to work with a bad boss you have to work over them.

No Such Thing As A Free Lunch – They thought they could get away with it. NOT TODAY!

Short Nights Lead To Short Temper – Having a bit of a rant does work sometimes it seems!

Overtime Crime, Part 9 – What’s more important? Your daughter’s health or that your shift gets covered?

A Rose By Any Other Customer – When a lunch break isn’t.

 

We hope you enjoyed this collection of stories! Know any that we missed? Let us know in the comments! Want to submit your own story? Do it here!

Stay safe, everyone!


Have you been enjoying our roundups? Check out more here to see if you’ve missed any!