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Ripping Apart Their Excuses

| MD, USA | Crazy Requests

(I’m putting away items when the new associate approaches me. It is only her second or third shift.)

Coworker: *nervously* “Do we discount damaged items? The lady at the register is asking.”

(Giving her a smile, I follow her back to the registers to handle the situation.)

Me: “How can I help you today?”

Customer: “This coat has a huge rip it in! You have to discount it for me.” *she shoves the coat in my face*

(I take the coat from her and start trying to look for what she’s talking about. Clearly upset that I won’t take her word for it she points at a few threads sticking out of the seam, which is in no way a rip/tear in the coat.)

Me: “Ma’am, this is excess thread from when they were serging the seams, not a rip. It’s perfectly normal on clothing items that are mass produced.”

Customer: *getting more upset that I won’t mark the brand new item down for her* “You should still discount it.”

Me: “I would be happy to get you another one from the back. Since the jackets are so large, we only keep one of each size out.”

(While explaining this, I grab a pair of scissors and snip off the threads so that the coat looks just like all the other ones.)

Customer: “It’s going to get a hole in it now!”

(I give the woman a steady look before taking hold of the jacket and tugging with some force at the spot I cut the thread from. Nothing happens to the coat.)

Me: “No, I don’t think it is.”

(The customer purchased the coat, at full price, and left without another word.)

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Making A Messy Diaper Of Things

| CA, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior, Family & Kids

(I work in a small gas station that has a small aisle of hygienic products tampons, diapers, soap, etc. A guy who looks about twenty three walks in and goes over to the aisle, he stays for a moment, looking in his wallet a few times before coming up with two boxes of diapers and a pack of tampons. He’s behind an older man with two cases of beer and a box of diapers.)

Older Man: *mutters* “I only have ten f****** dollars…” *places diapers off to the side and pushes beer towards me*

(The man pays for his beer and leaves, muttering about how mad his wife’s gonna be when he gets home without diapers. The younger man steps forward and put his stuff down. When he saw the price he smiled a bit.)

Young Man: “And a pack of [Brand] cigarettes. But I can actually put my kid and girlfriend before habits.”

(He had his ID and everything.)

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This Customer Giving You An Earful

| MD, USA | Bizarre, Health & Body

(My store mostly sells gifts, but we have a rack of jewelry pieces, as well. I come around a display to check on a customer, and realize she has her hand to her ear, an expression of pain, and there’s blood on her hand.)

Customer: “I used to have my ears pierced when I was a baby, but they grew shut when I was in college. I was seeing if I could open them again with these earrings.”

(The woman was easily middle-aged, so her ears had healed decades before.)

Me: *horrified* “We don’t even allow pierced people to try on earrings for hygienic reasons, but definitely not to pierce ears!”

(She asks to use the bathroom to wash the blood, while I wipe down anything she touched with gloves and bleach, and throw out the earring she used and anything that she touched. She comes out of the bathroom.)

Customer: “Where can I get my ears pierced?”

Me: “There’s a tattoo and piercing parlor a block over.”

Customer: “A TATTOO place! Do you know how unhygienic that place could be?!”

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Fine Print And A Fine Wife

| Pittsburgh, PA, USA | At The Checkout, Bad Behavior

(I get a page that a customer is heading to check out. I head over to the register to ring them up, an older couple holding one of our “take me” tags with item numbers on them.)

Me: “Hey, how was your shopping experience?”

Wife: “It was nice; we need two of these today, please.”

Husband: “They’re on sale.”

Me: “Great! Let me make sure we have them in stock.” *I page back to the warehouse and get the okay that we have them* “Okay, so we have them. Did you want us to have them built? It’s 80 a piece.”

Wife: *pointing to husband* “That’s what he is for.”

(All three of us laugh, I begin scanning in the numbers they come up 219.99.)

Husband: “That’s wrong; you have a sign that says 40% off!”

Me: *dreading this since it will be the fourth time today dealing with this issue* “Well, sir… it actually it’s up to 40% off on select—”

Husband: “Right, select, and it was part of it!”

Wife: “Calm down.”

Me: “I will check for you but I am pretty sure this is not part of this offer.”

(Still remaining calm I page back to a coworker who checks and it comes back not on sale no signs are near it either.)

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, that desk is not part of—”

Husband: “That is false advertising!”

Me: “I’m sorry you feel that way but it is no—”

Husband: “Yes, it is! There are signs everywhere!” *points to the first sign walking in the door about the up to* “See? How was I supposed to know it’s not one of the select ones?!”

Me: “Well, sir, if you read the fin—”

Husband: “The fine print, missy. I am—”

Me: “Sir, please refrain from calling me by anything other than my name, [My Name].”

Husband: “Now, listen here, m—”

Wife: “Enough, [Husband]. Leave the girl alone. I told you it wasn’t on sale. [My Name], please ring this up, I saw that if I have a rewards I can save 10%. Is this true?”

Me: “Yes, may I have your phone number?”

Wife: “Of course.” *glaring at her husband, gives the number*

(Her husband has snuck outside to smoke.)

Wife: “I’m sorry about him. He tries this all the time.”

Me: “No worries, I’m just glad I could help you out. Would you like one of us to load these into your car?”

Wife: *thinks for a moment and smirks* “No, I think I will have [Husband] do it; maybe it will teach him.”

Me: *laughs* “Well, if you decided he has learned his lesson feel free to ask for our help. Good luck; have a great day!”

Wife: “Thanks for the help.” *leaves as I look out the window I see her ripping him a new one and he comes in to get the desks refusing to look at me*

Me: “Have a great day, sir!”

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Checkout This Scam

| TX, USA | At The Checkout, Liars & Scammers, Money, Non-Dialogue

A man buys a pack of cigarettes with a $50 bill. As I count his change back to him, he asks what he’d paid with, and I tell him it was a $50. He asks to buy it back, and counts out $49 in smaller bills and lays out 99 cents on the counter. I hand him the $50 for the $49 while he fishes for the last coin he needs. He comes up with a $1, which he gives me, along with the $50 and asks for a $100 instead.

We don’t have any $100s, nor other $50s. While I’m trying to figure out how to give him his money back, the fact that this is a scam occurs to me. I tell him, politely, that $50 of the money in my hands is mine, and he can either have the $50 bill or the small bills. He chooses the small bills. He then asks if he can buy the $50 back, and I let him.

Surprise, surprise, he tries the scam again, but this time I’m watching to see how it works, what he’s doing, and what I need to watch for in the future. Once he hands me the $50 back to ask for $100 again, I tell him he’s scamming me and is no longer welcome in the store. He grumbles a bit as he gathers up the change, but goes.

The next morning I come up $50 long. Apparently when I was kicking him out I forgot to give him his $50 back. So, to recap, I learned how to spot this kind of thing AND he ended up losing $50 on the deal. And if he hadn’t been greedy, and done the same kind of thing using a $10 to get $20, I wouldn’t have had the momentary confusion and he might have gotten away with it.

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