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Keeps Going Salon And On

Hastings, MN, USA | Crazy Requests

(I am working at the service desk. One of my duties there is to answer the phone. Usually I just have to park the call and page the department the customer wants. Occasionally they have a question for service desk. I get a call from a guy that sounds maybe in his 40s.)

Me: “[Store], how may I help you?”

Customer: “Yeah, I’m going to be in Thursday, but I was wondering – do you know if there’s a salon nearby you?”

Me: “Uh… one moment, sir.”

(I put the phone down and get my CSM. We quietly discuss for a second about the nearest hair cutter places, both of us exchanging a glance at the odd question.)

Me: “Okay, sir, there is a [Hair Salon #1] and a [Hair Salon #2] located near us.”

Customer: “Is that all you know of?”

Me: “Yes, sir.”

Customer: “You mean to tell me you don’t know of any salons next to your store?”

Me: “Uh… no, sir?”

Customer: *exasperated and annoyed noise* “Well, you just lost a customer!” *hangs up*

Me: Uh?

Coworker: “Did he REALLY call to ask about a salon?”

Me: “Yeah? And apparently we just lost a customer?!”

Coworker: “We’re a grocery store!”

Me: “That’s what I wanted to say!”

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Not Their Finest Hour(s)

| MI, USA | Crazy Requests, Time

(At rush hour on a Saturday night, a party of 16 people comes in. I am a hostess.)

Me: “It’s going to be about one-and-a-half hour wait for you guys.”

Customer: “Okay, we will stay.” *walks away*

Me: *writes down info including the time they came in*

(Twenty minutes later.)

Customer: *storms up to the host stand* “Where the h*** is our table?! We have been waiting for TWO HOURS!”

Me: “Sir, it’s still going to be a little bit. You came in at 7:20, it is now 7:40 and I quoted you at an hour-and-a-half, so it’s probably still going to be another hour.”

Customer: “This is BS. Are you stupid or something? We have been waiting two hours!”

Me: “If you want, I can get my manager for you so she can help you out.”

(My manager comes out, and says the same exact thing to them that I do. The customers proceed to go and tell all the people waiting that we are understaffed, that if I wasn’t a girl he would punch me in the face, and that we probably have bugs in the kitchen. Twenty minutes after that.)

Customer: “Can you people seriously not tell time? We have been waiting for hours!”

Me: “I promise I am trying to get tables for you as fast as I can, but it’s only 8:15 now so you still probably have another 45 minutes. It is Saturday night and there are other parties here. We do call ahead seating if you choose to come in with a large party again and want to speed up your wait time.”

Customer: “There is no way I am ever eating at this place again! I will report your horrible attitude to your manager!” *storms off*

(After all that, they still ate at the restaurant and ended up stiffing the server on an over $250 meal.)

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A-Salted With Your Fishy Tale

| NJ, USA | NJ, USA | Bizarre, Crazy Requests, Pets & Animals, Popular

Me: “Hello, this is [Pool Store]. How can I help you?”

Customer: *on the phone* “Hi, I just bought a house with a pool and had some questions.”

Me: “Certainly. First I need to know if it’s a salt or freshwater pool.”

Customer: “I don’t know; how could I find that out?”

Me: “I need to you check to see if you have a salt generator or not.”

Customer: “All right, I think it’s a salt pool. How would I start it up?”

Me: “Do you know the gallonage of your pool?”

Customer: “Yes, it’s [average size pool].”

Me: “All right. Well, looking at my chart, you’re going to need 625lbs of salt to reach the required concentration if the concentration is currently 0ppm.”

Customer: “That’s a lot of salt.”

Me: “Yes, it is, sir.”

Customer: “How would I add the salt?”

Me: “Just toss it into the pool; there’s no special way of adding it.”

Customer: “That’s not how you do it.”

Me: “Yes, it is, sir. There may be other systems out there but if it’s our pool then you don’t have a special salt system attached.”

Customer: “Are you sure that’s how you add it?”

Me: “Yes. You want to raise your salt level to between 3000ppm and 3500ppm and to go to that from scratch, for your size pool, you need to add 625lbs of salt.”

Customer: “All right. Is it going to taste like salt?”

Me: “That’s a common misconception with salt pools. If the salt is within that range you won’t taste salt; if it’s 6000pm or higher you may.”

Customer: “So you’re telling me I need to add 1250lbs of salt?”

Me: “Not unless you want to taste salt.”

Customer: “What if I want to?”

Me: “Why would you want to taste salt?”

Customer: “Because I want it to be like the ocean.”

Me: “Ok…”

Customer: “How much salt would I have to add to my pool to be able to put fish in and swim.”

Me: “Are you telling me you want to make an open air salt water aquarium out of your pool?”

Customer: “Yes.”

Me: “Then I suggest you talk to a pet store. We can sell the salt but I have no experience in maintaining marine life.”