A Super-Brew, Iron Grind, And Served Dark (Knight)

| QLD, Australia | Food & Drink, Geeks Rule, Theme Of The Month

(The coffee chain I work at collects money for a children’s charity. Once a month we dress up in costumes; it’s a lot of fun. This month the theme is Superheroes. I’m female, but dressed as Iron Man; there’s also Wonder Woman, Super Girl, and Batgirl.)

Elderly Customer: “Can you actually fly in that get-up?”

Me: “Sure can, but it spills the coffees.”

Male Customer: “Super heroes? Serving coffee? It’s like all my teenage dreams come true! Except for you, Iron Man, cause I don’t swing that way.”

Regular Customer: “Did you get a second job?”

Me: “Yep. Saving the world doesn’t pay the bills.”

RPG = Really Pretentious Gamer

| PA, USA | Bad Behavior, Technology

(It’s a slow day, and there are only two customers in the store. One of the customers, a friend of mine who’s 21, but looks like a high-schooler, comes to the counter with a copy of ‘Halo 4’.)

Friend: “I’d like to buy this, please.”

(Suddenly, the other customer, a guy in his mid-20s, runs up and attempts to rip the game out of my friend’s hands. My friend manages to leap back in time.)

Friend: “Hey, man! What is your problem?”

Customer: “What the f*** are you doing buying that s***? Little whiny b***y kids like you shouldn’t even be touching this!”

Friend: “I’m 21, and even then you could just say that, and not try to grab it from me!”

Customer: “Yeah, well, you shouldn’t be supporting Microsoft anyway! They’re fascist f***s ruining the industry with their generic frat boy s***! It’s a**-holes like you who only encourage them!”

Me: “Okay, that’s enough! If you’re going to continue insulting my friend or his gaming preferences, I’m going to ask you to leave the store.”

Customer: “Hmph! That a**-hole is no gamer! Real gamers play RPGs, not shallow generic First Person Shooters! I would’ve smashed that s*** and laughed in his face!”

(As he storms out, he gives one last parting shot.)

Customer: “When the second crash occurs, it’ll be on your hands!”

Being Franc About The Dollar

| France | Geography, Money, Tourists/Travel

(It is when the French Franc is still in use. I get called by a cashier who has a problem with American tourists.)

Tourist: “This woman won’t accept our money!”

(The tourist is waving about a wad of US dollars.)

Me: “Well, she can’t, sir, since you’re trying to pay in US dollars.”

Customer: “So?”

Me: “Well, you’re in France. We only accept French Francs.”

Customer: “I don’t understand! All the other third world countries we’ve been to accept dollars.”

Me: “France isn’t a third world country.”

Customer: “…”

Me: “There’s a bank right down the street. We’ll hold on to your items until you come back with Francs. Or you can pay with a visa card.”

Customer: “No, we’re not coming back; you’re not getting our dollars!”