Why Do You Keep Shopping Here

| Right | August 7, 2013

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That Means A Customer Did That

| Right | August 7, 2013

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Too Much Gravy For The Brain, Part 2

| Scotland, UK | Right | August 6, 2013

Customer: “Could I get the whisky gravy without whisky please?”

Me: “Of course, I’ll ask the chef to make your dish with plain gravy.”

Customer: “No! I don’t want plain gravy! I want the whisky gravy without the whisky!”

Me: “Sir, the whisky gravy without whisky is just plain gravy.”

(This goes on for a minute or two. The customer’s wife turns and whispers to me.)

Customer’s Wife: “Just bring him plain gravy; it’ll take him a while to figure it out.”

Related:
Too Much Gravy For The Brain

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Anatomy Of An Idiot

| Philadelphia, PA, USA | Right | August 6, 2013

(A customer comes to the register and puts a leather bound copy of ‘Grey’s Anatomy’ on the counter.)

Customer: “Yes, I would like to return this book; it wasn’t what I expected.”

Me: “Okay, I can do that for you.”

Customer: “It was terrible; it’s not at all like the television show.”

Me: “Excuse me?”

Customer: “It’s my favorite show, and I was really excited to read this, but I don’t know what they were thinking with this book.”

(I am dumbfounded, but I finish the transaction and send the customer on her way. The next customer in line approaches.)

Next Customer: “How is it you manage to get through a full day of that sort of bull-s*** and not punch yourself in the face?”

Me: “No idea, sir.”

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Yaoi Got To Be Kidding

| Los Angeles, CA, USA | Right | August 6, 2013

(I work at a comic shop that has a high number of female employees, with most of my coworkers having a specialty in knowledge; i.e. comics, figurines, card games, etc. A pair of very obnoxious customers walks in, and heads straight to me at the back of the shop.)

Customer #1: “Hey, I need to know if you have a [specific arc] of X-force?”

Coworker #1: “Do you mean [arc] of the third series, or that old one done by Loeb?”

Customer #2: “Hey b****! Butt out! I’m asking the only real nerd on your staff a question.”

Me: “I’m not sure, however [coworker #1] organizes our older comic collection and probably knows if we have it or not.”

Customer #1: “Quit trying to give the b**** fake nerd cred, yo. Everyone knows the only girls who work here are a bunch of Yaoi-fangirls.”

(Customer #1 points towards our manga and anime section. Coworker #2 walks over due to all the commotion.)

Coworker #2: “You do realize that [my name] is the only one of us who reads manga? H***, it’s why we hired him in the first place.”

(Both customers look pretty embarrassed, and quietly ask Coworker #1 if we have the comic arc in question. They won’t even look at any of us as they pay for their purchase. After they leave, Coworker #1 comes up to me.)

Coworker #1: “So, apparently you’re a Yaoi-fangirl?”

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