Your Own Worst Critic

| Memphis, TN, USA | At The Checkout, Bigotry

(A woman comes into the store and walks up to the clerk.)

Customer: “Some lady parked wrong and is blocking all of the traffic in the parking lot.”

Me: “Did you see her come into this store?”

Customer: “No, I didn’t see her at all.”

Me: “Then, how do you know that it was a woman?”

Customer: “Because women always do things wrong.”

(The woman in line behind her gasps at this.)

Customer: “Well, that’s what my husband tells me.”

Numbers Don’t Lie

| Perth, Western Australia, Australia | At The Checkout, Criminal & Illegal

(I’m a checkout assistant at a supermarket working the night of Halloween. A teenager and his girlfriend come to the checkout at about 8pm with three dozen eggs.)

Me: “You’re not the ones who have been egging people in the carpark, are you?”

Customer: “Uh, no. We, um, just want to make an omelette.”

Me: “You’re making a thirty-six egg omelette? How big is your frying pan?”

Customer: “S***.” *runs out of the store*

Where The Car Parks You

| London, UK | Uncategorized

(I work within a very large concert hall selling programmes for the concerts. A large man walks up to me.)

Me: “Hello, sir, how can I help you today?”

Man: *strong Russian accent* “Excuse me, but where is the Russian carpark?”

Me: “Pardon, sir, could you repeat that?”

Man: “Where is the Russian carpark?”

Me: “The Russian car park?”

Man: “Yes!”

Me: “There isn’t one. There’s just a regular car park.”

Man: “Oh.” *walks off*

An Invitation Nonetheless

, | Jacksonburg, OH, USA | Top

Me: “911, what is your emergency?”

Caller: “I’m a bad, bad boy.”

Me: “Yes, you are. I have a squad car en route to your location. Have a good day, sir.”

Not Always Right Holiday iPod Touch Tweet & Follow Giveaway!

| Twitter | Uncategorized

The NAR Holiday iPod Touch Giveaway Contest is almost over, so be sure to enter now!

iPod Touch Tweet & Follow GiveawayThe holidays are just around the corner, so Not Always Right is starting your season off right by giving away a free iPod Touch (8GB in your choice of black or white) to one lucky reader!

To enter our contest, just Tweet (or ReTweet) AND Follow:

  1. Tweet the following message, being sure to specify your job title:

    I am a [job title] and The Customer is Not Always Right! #iPodTouch #contest (RT your job & follow @notalwaysright to enter)

  2. Follow @notalwaysright.

The contest begins:
Monday, 11/21/11 at 12:00 pm Pacific

The contest ends:
Monday, 12/5/11 at 12 pm Pacific

One lucky winner will be selected and announced on Tuesday, 12/6/11 at 12 pm Pacific. Then, a shiny new iPod Touch will be shipped by 12/9/11, with plenty of time before the holidays arrive!


  1. You must Tweet the specific Tweet above with your job title above to qualify. Note: It’s okay if you’re a student or unemployed — just indicate it in the place of the job title.
  2. You must Follow @notalwaysright to qualify.
  3. Enter as many times as you’d like, but make sure to make each Tweet unique!

PS – Not Always Right will have more awesome contests soon, so Follow us on Twitter @notalwaysright to be the first to know!

PS #2 – Not on Twitter? No worries — a contest for non-Twitter users is coming soon!

– The Not Always Right Team

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