Transactions For Dummies

| Florida, USA | Money

(I am working the register at a well-known video game store, when a customer approaches with a stack of games and his son.)

Me: “That will be $87.96.”

Customer: “Here.” *gives me a gift card worth $25*

Me: *processes gift card* “Your balance is $62.96.”

Customer: “What do you I do now?”

Me: “You give me more money.”

Customer: “Oh, sorry. I have never been here before…”

Zip Unless You Know Your Zip

| St. Catharines, Ontario, Canada | Geography

Customer: “I live in this area but I don’t know my postal code. What is the postal code for here? They will be similar…it’s just so I have an idea of what postal code is.”

Me: “I don’t know off by heart. If you give me a minute, I could look it up.”

Customer: “That’s ridiculous. How can you not know the postal code?! You WORK here!”

Me: “Um, sir, you don’t know the postal code to your own address and you LIVE here.”

Some Barters Will Get You Busted

| Chicago, IL, USA | Criminal & Illegal

(A middle-aged man walks up to my register with some odds and ends.)

Me: “Hello, did you find everything okay today?”

Customer: “Well, eventually. I had some help. All the guys on the floor are really helpful.”

Me: “That’s good to hear.”

(I continue ringing out the man’s purchases in silence for a few seconds.)

Customer: “Yeah, I’m not real good with all that fix-it stuff…but if you ever need a good batch of cocaine, I can whip that up real fast!”

TMI On The VJ, Toots

| Louisiana, USA | Rude & Risque

(An elderly woman approaches my counter at work.)

Customer: “Excuse me, young man, but is your grandfather’s name Sean?”

Me: “No, ma’am, why do you ask?”

Customer: “You look just like the sailor I celebrated VJ Day with!” *winks*

Right Next To The Pee Not And Cabinet, Part 2

| Massachusetts, USA | Food & Drink

(I work in the wine department of a well known grocery chain.)

Customer: “Can you show me where the Charbonnay is?”

Me: “Ah, you mean Chardonnay. It’s right over here.”

(I hand her a bottle.)

Customer: “That’s not Charbonnay. Charbonnay is RED!”

Me: “Oh, sorry. Here you go!”

(I hand her a bottle of Cabernet sauvignon.)

Customer: “That’s more like it!” *waddles off grumbling about how stupid I am*

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Right Next To The Pee Not And Cabinet

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