Qurious Qucumbers

| Oklahoma City, OK, USA | Language & Words

Me: “Okay, great. Your confirmation number is A like ‘Apple’, Z like ‘Zebra’, Q like—”

Customer: *cheerfully* “Q like ‘Cucumber’?”

Me: “Sure. Q like Cucumber it is.”

Aisle Always Need Directions

| Houston, TX, USA | Uncategorized

Customer: “I just walked in to the auditorium to see [movie title], and the movie is already playing.”

Me: “May I see your ticket stub?”

(She shows me her ticket stub while I continue to tear other customers’ tickets.)

Me: “Ma’am, you chose to see [movie] for the 2:15 showtime. Do you want to watch that movie for the next showtime? The next one won’t be playing until 5 PM.”

Customer: *irritated* “But the movie has already started! I don’t know what to do!”

Me: “Well, since you have missed the first 45 minutes of the movie, I can only get you to wait until the next showtime. That, or we can get you either a rain check or a refund.”

Customer: “Then tell me. What do you want me to do?!”

Me: “You’ll have to go back to the box office and have them exchange your ticket for another ticket for the 5:00 showtime, or have them get you your refunds.”

Customer: *starts yelling* “But I don’t want to do that! The movie already has started! You need to tell me what do I do!”

Me: “Let me get you the manager.”

Customer: “You don’t know anything!” *walks away*

To Whom This May (Not) Concern, Part 3

| Canada | Food & Drink

(There are at least 10 people in the restaurant. I am the only person manning front counter, so when I finish bagging each order, I call out what I’m holding so the customer can come pick it up.)

Me: “Cheeseburger combo. Cheeseburger combo!”

Customer: *raises his hand*

Me: “Cheeseburger combo?”

Customer: *takes bag*

(I continue taking orders and bagging them as they come up. Two minutes later, the customer that took the cheeseburger combo comes back.)

Customer: “Hey, this is a cheeseburger combo. I ordered a chicken burger!”

(I take the cheeseburger combo back from him and continue bagging orders. About a minute later, he has his chicken burger.)

Me: *gives him his chicken burger*

Customer: *gives me a condescending look and stomps off*

Related:
To Whom This May (Not) Concern
To Whom This May (Not) Concern, Part 2

Easy Sleazy Customers

| Arizona, USA | Rude & Risque

(I’m a waitress at a sushi place.)

Me: “Well, thank you for coming in gentlemen. Have a great day!”

Customer #1: “You were really great to us, so thank you.”

Me: “Yeah, of course, anytime! You guys were easy to take care of!”

Customer #2: “We were easy?”

Me: “I didn’t mean it like that!”

Customer #2: “It’s okay, I’d be easy for you! Have a great day.”

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