He Got BUS-ted

| Sydney, NSW, Australia | Right | October 10, 2013

(I’m at the busiest train station in the state, waiting to get out of the station to grab some lunch whilst I wait for my train. I get stuck behind a man whose train ticket will not allow him to exit through the ticket gates.)

Passenger: “Excuse me, my ticket isn’t working!”

Employee: “Oh, can I see your ticket, please?”

Passenger: “I bought this from a news agency. It’s supposed to work on all trains!”

(The passenger hands the employee a pre-paid bus ticket.)

Employee: “I’m sorry, sir, but this ticket won’t work here. This is not a train ticket.”

Passenger: “But I bought it from a newsagent! It has to work!”

Employee: “I don’t know what else to tell you, mate. This ticket will not work on this service, and you have wasted your money. I can let you through the gate, though, if you’ll just step back to let the gate open.”

Passenger: “This is RIDICULOUS! This ticket is supposed to work! I used my hard-earned money on it! I spent Australian currency on this! Why isn’t it working?!”

(There is now a very long line of irate people waiting for the man to just go through the now open gate. The employee is dumbfounded as to why the man won’t just leave. I lose my temper because I’m hungry and my train is to leave shortly, so I step in.)

Me: “Dude. You bought the wrong ticket. That ticket is a bus ticket. Operative word: BUS. This is a train station.”

Passenger: “I don’t care! I bought it and therefore it should work!”

Me: “Yeah, it will work on a bus, but that brings us back to the original predicament: this is a train station, so your ticket will not work, no matter how much you harass people about it.”

Passenger: “Nobody asked you, you little b****.”

Me: “No, you’re right; nobody asked me. But I’m f****** hungry, and you are holding up a few dozen people. So please shut up, accept the fact that you screwed up, and get out of the way.”

Passenger: “You’ve got a mouth on you, don’t you?”

Me: “I do, and I’d like to fill it with food, so please get the f*** out of my way.”

(The passenger storms off, and I ask the employee if she can keep the gate open for me as I don’t want my ticket to get rejected on the way back through. She lets me through, and I go to get some food and come back. As I come back to the gate, there is a security guard and another employee standing with the first employee. The security guard approaches me with a notepad.)

Security Guard: “Excuse me, miss: I just have a question for you. Are you in any way affiliated with [rail company] as a contractor or employee?”

Me: “No, I’m just trying to get to Woolongong to see a few friends.”

Security Guard: *closes notepad and smiles* “Thanks for that. That guy you told off? He tried to file an official complaint against you. He wouldn’t believe [Employee] when she said you don’t work here.”

Employee: “And thanks for that, by the way. Enjoy your trip to the coast!”

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Late Fees

| Right | October 10, 2013

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Female Beast Spawn

| Right | October 10, 2013

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Doing A Job On Having A Job

, | London, England, UK | Right | October 9, 2013

(It’s about 6:30 am. I’m working drive-thru near to the end of an overnight shift. The queue is pretty slow because we’re serving breakfast, and many people have complex grill orders that need to be filled. A customer pulls up to my window and pays without saying a word. However, as soon as I start to take another order, the customer yells at me.)

Customer: “Why is my order taking so d*** long?”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but there is a fairly large order for the two cars in front. We’re rather understaffed today, too.”

Customer: “Well, get them to move faster! It’s alright for some! Unlike you I actually have a JOB to get to!”

Me: *stares down at my work uniform*

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Perplexing Paper Positioning Possibilities

| VA, USA | Right | October 9, 2013

(A customer comes to check out with a basket of art supplies, including a pad of drawing paper. The customer hands me the other items, but stands there holding a shopping list and the paper, looking back and forth between them and frowning.)

Me: “The paper, too?”

Customer: “Will this work?”

(The customer’s list has ’12 x 18′ written on it.)

Customer: “How do I know if this will work?”

Me: “The paper cover says ’18 x 12.'”

Customer: “But she wrote ’12 x 18!'”

Me: “… well, she didn’t specify the kind of paper or the kind of pad, just the size. This is the same size; she just wrote it a different way.”

Customer: “Oh, but, I don’t know!” *very anxious* “How can you be sure?”

(My coworker sees the confusion and comes over.)

Coworker: “Did you have a question?”

Customer: “I’m supposed to buy ’12 x 18,’ but I can only find ’18 x 12.'”

Coworker: “…uh, you should be fine. See, you can hold it two ways, so it doesn’t really matter which side the binding is on. You can always cut the drawings out. It’s the same size paper.”

Customer: “This is just so perplexing to me!”

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