A Triple Rainbow Of Pens

| NY, USA | Right | September 13, 2013

(I work part time at the local convenience store that sells school supplies, snacks, basic clothing, and other things. A customer walks in smelling heavily of marijuana.)

Customer: “Can I get some pens?”

Me: “Umm, sure.”

(I show the customer over to the area where we keep pens and pencils.)

Customer: “Whoa… YOU GUYS HAVE PINK PENS?!”

Me: “Yes, why?”

Customer: “I didn’t know they made pink pens!”

Me: “Umm… they make pens in every color, sir.”

Customer: “Even… ORANGE?!”

Me: “Yes, even orange.”

Customer: “Even YELLOW?! Oh wait, that’d just be a highlighter.”

Me: *points at yellow gel pens* “No, they make yellow pens too.”

Customer: “WOW!”

(The customer buys his pens and leaves. Good to know I may have changed someone’s life.)

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Enquiring Children Enquiring About Children

| TX, USA | Right | September 13, 2013

(I am carrying on quite a conversation with a four-year-old girl while I check her mother out at my store. I am 19.)

Mom: “Stop asking so many questions; you’re bothering the lady!”

Me: “No! It’s okay; I’m happy to answer. I think it’s great that she’s so curious!”

Mom: “You must have kids.”

Me: “Oh no, not yet.”

Little Girl: “You don’t have kids?!” *whimpers, sounding heartbroken* “Why? You don’t like kids?”

Me: “No, no, I love kids! I’m just really young, and I’m not ready to have kids yet.”

Little Girl: “Well… when will you be ready?”

Me: “When I have more time and money. I want to make sure I can take good care of my kids, and right now I can barely take good care of myself!”

Little Girl: “Well, that makes sense. Okay then!”

(The little girl then gives me a nod approval.)

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The Yeast Of Your Worries

| MD, USA | Right | September 13, 2013

(I work at a pet store/grooming salon establishment. One of the grooming dogs comes in with a suspected yeast infection. We inform the customer of the possibility, and they say they will take care of it. A week later, I’m opening the store and the customer comes back in.)

Customer: “I demand to speak to the groomer!”

Me: “I’m sorry, but she’s not here right now. She doesn’t have any groom appointments for today. Was there anything I could help you with?”

Customer: “Yeah, you can explain to me why the h*** your groomer said my dog had a yeast infection, when nothing I’ve been doing to treat it has been working! I demand reimbursement for the cost of the treatment!”

Me: “I’m sorry to hear that ma’am, but I’m afraid we can’t reimburse you for veterinary treatment you’ve sought because of a medical condition that existed in your dog prior to the grooming appointment.”

Customer: “Veterinary treatment? I didn’t go to the vet!”

Me: “You haven’t? What treatment have you been using that needs reimbursing?”

Customer: “I’ve bought $40 worth of bread in the past week!”

Me: “…bread?”

Customer: “Yeah! The groomer said it was a f****** yeast infection, so I’ve been giving him lots of bread to fix it!”

Me: “I’m… not sure I follow ma’am.”

Customer: “What, am I not giving him enough bread? Does he need bread with more yeast in it?”

Me: “Oh… OH! Uhm, having a yeast infection doesn’t mean he needs to eat things with yeast IN it.”

Customer: “So… he doesn’t need bread?”

Me: “…no.”

(I instruct the customer to add pro-biotic yogurt to her dog’s food and take him to the vet as soon as she could. The customer leaves rather embarrassed. We get a call later on that her dog recovers soon after that, and now she’s a regular customer for yogurt dental bones!)

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Charged Up With Anger–If Nothing Else, Part 2

| WI, USA | Right | September 12, 2013

(I work at a retailer where we frequently sell and install car batteries. I am currently installing one with the customer constantly looking over my shoulder.)

Me: “Sir, one of these bolts is stripped; I will have to replace it or the car will not start.”

Customer: “I’m sure it will be fine.”

Me: “But, sir—”

Customer: “JUST LEAVE IT!”

(I finish hooking up the battery and the car does not start just as I told him.)

Customer: “Oh you really f****** up! You just ruined my wife’s $60,000 truck! I need to get an emissions test done; now it’s going to fail. Do you even know what the f*** you’re doing?”

Me: “Sir, there is nothing wrong with the truck. Like I told you earlier, the bolt needs to be replaced. I’ll be more than happy to do it free of charge.”

(I begin replacing the bolt silently, all while he is screaming and questioning my intelligence. I finish and the car starts up immediately.)

Customer: “YOU KNOW WHAT!? You don’t know what you’re doing; I don’t want your battery anymore! Put my old one back in; I’m going to the dealer!”

(At this point I’ve heard enough, and politely oblige and quickly go back in to help another customer who has been patiently waiting. 30 seconds later, my original customer rushes back into the store.)

Customer: “YOU DUMB-A**! My car won’t start! I knew you had no idea what you’re doing! And now my $60,000 truck is ruined because of your stupidity!”

Me: “Sir, your car isn’t starting because you told me to put your dead battery back in, after I had it running with the new one. Now this customer has been waiting patiently; I will gladly help you after I help this gentleman.”

(The original continues to have a fit in front of all the other customers, insulting me and my intelligence. I turn to the next customer.)

Next Customer: *in a very cheery voice* “Hi, how are you today!?”

Me: “Oh, I’m just wonderful. What can I do for you today?”

(The next customer looks at the angry original customer, then back at me with a huge grin on his face.)

Next Customer: “Yes! I have truck outside that needs a battery. Would you mind installing it for me?”

Original Customer: *lets out a moan of disgust, and storms out*

Related:
Charged Up With Anger–If Nothing Else

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A Whole New World

| NC, USA | Right | September 12, 2013

(I’m spending the summer with my grandmother in a small southern town, but I’m from Connecticut.)

Me: “Hello, I’m [name]. I’ll be your server today. Can I start you off with something to drink?”

Customer: *in a thick southern drawl* “What an unusual accent! Where are you from?”

Me: “I’m from New England.”

Customer: “How lovely! I’ve always wanted to go to Europe!”

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