Inexorably Inconsiderate

, | Guelph, ON, Canada | Uncategorized

(The customer is four cents short for his order.)

Customer, to friend: “Hey man, do you have a nickel or something?”

Friend: “Yeah man, here.”

Customer: “No, that’s okay. I’ll just get some out of here.”

(He reaches into the tip jar.)

Customer: “Can I just take out four cents from in here?”

Me: “Um, no. That’s actually our tip jar–”

Customer: “Too late. It’s happening.”

Me: *speechless*

Similar Tool, Different Outcome

| Minneapolis, MN, USA | Rude & Risque

(I am working at an Arts and Crafts store. I am talking to a coworker when I see an older woman come up to the counter.)

Me: “Hi, can I help you find something?”

Customer: “Yes, do you have anything I can use to shave balls? ”

(There is an awkward silence between the customer and I while I process what she is asking her. Finally, she chimes in, elaborating.)

Customer: “Off of sweaters?”

(I realize that she is talking about a device to remove sweater pills, the little fuzzy dots that sometimes appear after washing.)

Me: “Oh! This way please.”

(I take her over to the yarn section and help her find what she is looking for. I walk back over to my coworker.)

Me: “Is it just me or did it sound like she was asking for–”

Coworker: “Yeah, it definitely did!”

Keep That Style To Yourself

, | Stockton, CA, USA | Food & Drink, Rude & Risque

(I take orders at a fast food restaurant. We have a secret menu with special type of fry we call “animal style”, which is pretty popular. A customer walks up.)

Me: “Hi, how are you doing today? How may I help you?”

Customer: “I have heard about this secret style french fry you guys make. Could I have one order of french fries, doggy style, please?”

Me: “Um…do you mean animal style fries?”

Customer: *turning red* “Yeah, that’s what I meant.”

Related:
The Horrors Of Mispronunciation, Part 4
The Horrors Of Mispronunciation, Part 3
The Horrors Of Mispronunciation, Part 2
The Horrors Of Mispronunciation

What Difference Does It Make

| California, USA | Uncategorized

Customer: “What movies do you NOT have?”

Me: “Sorry, what did you say?”

Customer: “I said, what movies don’t you have?”

Me: “Well we have a sign up that advertises the moves that we DO have. If it isn’t on that sign, then we don’t have the movie.”

Customer: “You really ought to put up a sign that lists the movies that you don’t have.”

But Cheddar Is Always Beddar

| Peterborough, ON, Canada | Food & Drink

(I work in a coffee shop that is now advertising using real cheese instead of processed cheese.)

Customer: “Can I get a chocolate chip muffin please?”

Me: “Sure, that will be [price].”

Customer: “And can I get that without cheese?”

Me: *confused* “We actually don’t put cheese on our muffins.”

Customer: “Oh, well, I saw on the commercial that everything now has real cheese on it, so I really don’t want that.”

Me: “Well, we only put cheese on things like sandwiches. You won’t have cheese on much else. We have just changed to using real cheese instead of processed, so that’s what we’re advertising.”

Customer: “Well, that’s a relief!”

Related:
Dangerously Cheesy

Page 1,835/2,924First...1,8331,8341,8351,8361,837...Last