Like Her Hearing, Her Cents Comes And Goes

| Portland, OR, USA | At The Checkout, Money

Customer: “Hey, I believe I was charged the wrong price for this item. Could you refund it to me?”

Me: “Oh, of course, ma’am. Let me just see the receipt and I’d be happy to.”

Customer: “Here it is.”

(The customer hands me a receipt that is over three feet long and totals over $300.)

Me: “All right, which did you believe you were over-charged on?”

Customer: *points out three items*

Me: “Ma’am, it seems that you were charged an extra two cents for these two items here. Do you really want me to refund you the two pennies?”

Customer: “YES! And to be sure I want you to return and re-ring my purchase to make sure.”

Me: “Okay.”

(20 minutes later, after re-ringing her entire purchase, I let her know that she’ll be getting two pennies back.)

Customer: “What?! Why did you even do that if it was only two cents?! How stupid can you be?”

Me: “Um, ma’am, I informed you that you’d only get the two pennies back before I did the transaction.”

Customer: “No you didn’t! I can’t believe the incompetence of the people working here!”

(She takes her bag and walks out of the store, yelling obscenities the whole way.)

Warning: Reacts Poorly To Chemistry

, | Ohio, USA | Food & Drink

Customer: “And a cheeseburger with—” *mumbling*

Me: “I’m sorry, but with what?”

Customer: “No salt. S, A, L, T.”

Me: “Oh, salt, like sodium chloride…NaCl. Sure.”

Customer: “What!?”

Me: “Oh, sorry, I’m a chemistry nerd.”

Customer: “What’s NaCl?”

Me: “Sodium chloride. The chemical name for table salt. I just left school so I am in that mindset.”

Customer: “You put chemicals in your burgers!?”

1 Part Bleach To 100 Parts Stupidity

| Avondale, PA, USA | Extra Stupid, Pets & Animals, Top

Me: “How are you today? I’m told you needed help with fish?”

Customer: “Yeah, all my fish died after I cleaned my tank yesterday. My husband says that it may have had to do with me using bleach, but I told him he was wrong.”

Me: “Well, actually he is right. Bleach leaves residue on the glass. Even after rinsing it, that can kill the fish.”

Customer: “But I didn’t even rinse it.”

Me: “What did you do, then?”

Customer: “I just added it to the water. How could that kill them?”

It’s A Ruff Life In The Slums

| Mequon, WI, USA | Uncategorized

Customer: “Hey, what’s going on?!”

Me: “Excuse me, is something wrong?”

Customer: “Yeah, we went to go see Slumdog Millionaire with my kid and the first scene has all this violence! We thought it was about a dog!”

Me: “I can assure you, it’s not about that. It’s also R-rated. Did you see the ratings on our board?”

Customer: “No one reads those! I want a refund!”

There Must Be A Wormhole To The 20th Century

| Pennsylvania, USA | Technology

Patron: “Do you have a typewriter?”

Me: “No, sorry. We haven’t had one in a while, but I can show you how to use Word.”

Patron: “No, I need a typewriter. I want to put an address on an envelope.”

Me: “Well you can do that in—”

Patron: “I can’t believe you don’t have a typewriter. What kind of library doesn’t have a typewriter?! Where can I find one?”

Me: “I really don’t know. You could try [office supply store], I suppose.”

(The man leaves, grumbling. The next woman in line comes up.)

Patron #2: “I don’t suppose your computers can take floppies?”

Page 1,829/2,996First...1,8271,8281,8291,8301,831...Last