Damaging Their Reliability

| London, England, UK | Extra Stupid, Liars & Scammers, Technology, Tourists/Travel

(I am called for technical support to a customer’s house, since their wireless internet is not working.)

Customer: “So, my son got this wireless router but it doesn’t work, and I can’t connect to the internet anymore either.”

(I look at the modem to find that it has been completely unplugged. Instead, they have a wireless router without a power supply, and an ethernet line leading to the PC, but it’s not wired into anything else.)

Me: “Well, here is your problem; you have unplugged your modem and your new router won’t work unless it’s plugged into the modem, which you still have. I would be happy to wire the system back up for you if you have the old power supply available.”

Customer: “Well, I threw it out because my son said we didn’t need it.”

Me: “Er, right. You are aware that the modem and power supply are not your property? They are leased to you with your internet connection. I have a spare one, but it comes with a part cost and I will need to charge you for the loss of the old one.”

Customer: “I see what’s happening here; you’re trying to scam me out of money. I don’t want it.”

Me: “I can’t restore your connection without replacing the part. If it was broken or faulty, I would be able to do it for free, but since you just told me you threw it out, I have to charge you for it.”

Customer: “You won’t charge if it’s broken, right?”

Me: “Yes…”

Customer: “If the modem is broken, you can give me a new one right?”

(I think I see where this is going…)

Me: “Yes, if the modem is broken, I can give you an updated unit with a new power supply, but since your old unit does not appear to be faulty, I can’t replace it.”

Customer: “Okay, can you test it and see if it’s faulty?”

(I figured at this point that there is no harm, and that if it was showing fault I could replace it for free.)

Me: “Okay, let me just go and get the power supply from my van.”

(As I’m halfway out the door, I hear a massive bang, and the sounds of stamping. I head back upstairs to see the modem now on the floor, and the customer’s foot planted firmly on top.)

Customer: “It’s broken, so get me a new one.”

Me: “I just saw you destroy it.”

Customer: “I’ll pay you £30 to say you didn’t see anything.”

Me: “But it would have cost you £8 for a new power supply.”

Customer: “It’s not the amount; it’s the principle!”

(I eventually replaced the whole unit for a cost of £15 and left. Next month I heard the customer called back. The next technician that went there said that the customer’s son had come by and told his mother she didn’t need the modem, then unplugged it and threw it away. The company, after reading both our reports, decided to cancel the contract then and there.)

Acting An Oaf About The Loaf, Part 2

| Ottawa, ON, Canada | At The Checkout, Food & Drink, Money

(I work in a fast food sandwich chain. Our location is in a gas station, so we don’t prepare as much bread or produce as other large restaurants. Because of this, on busy days we tend to run out of certain kinds of bread.)

Customer: “Hi, can I get a [sandwich type] on cheese bread?”

Me: “Sure thing. Unfortunately, I’m all out of cheese bread at the moment. We’ve been pretty busy. Can I offer you something else?”

Customer: “So I guess that means the sandwich is free then, eh?”

Me: “Why would it be free?”

Customer: “Because you don’t have my favorite bread. That’s my favorite bread, and you haven’t got it. That’s a big problem. I’m a regular here; I own the pizza place down the road and I’m always here.”

Me: “Well, I’m sorry, sir, but we haven’t got any cheese bread at the moment. We’re in the process of baking more bread. If you want to wait a while, I can make you your sandwich with the bread you want.”

Customer: “NO! That’s unacceptable! I’m the customer and you’re supposed to serve me what I WANT! Where is your f****** manager?”

Me: “He isn’t in at the moment, sir. He’s here in the mornings.”

Customer: “Get him on the phone, NOW! I want to speak to him so I can tell him how to run a f****** business!”

Me: “You own the pizza place down the road, right?”

Customer: “That’s right! And we always have everything a customer wants!”

Me: “Let me ask you something: if a customer came in and asked for a slice of pepperoni pizza, and you were so busy that you didn’t have any, and he acted the way that you’re acting right now, would you serve him or would you kick him out?”

(He shut up after that and left. I came in the next morning to find a formal complaint from the head office, because of him. My boss ripped it up and gave me a pat on the back. I never saw that customer again.)

Related:
Acting An Oaf About The Loaf

Grand Theft Innocence, Part 6

| Carlisle, England, UK | Family & Kids, Geeks Rule, Technology, Top, Underaged

(I am 21 years old, and a huge ‘Pokémon’ fan. I notice that my receipt for the new Pokémon game is wrong, so I go in to check what happened. At the counter next to me is a middle aged woman buying ‘Grand Theft Auto 5’ for her young son, who is no older than nine. The game is intended for 18-year-olds minimum.)

Me: “Excuse me; the deposit for the new Pokémon is £5, but I’ve been charged twice for it.”

Employee: “Oh, sorry, let me have a look.”

(I hand him the receipt, while the woman stares at me.)

Woman: “You’re a little old to be playing Pokémon aren’t you?”

Me: “And your son’s a little young to be playing Grand Theft Auto isn’t he?”

(The employees can’t help but laugh. The woman goes red faced.)

Woman: “That’s completely different.”

Me: “Yeah, I’m getting a game intended for kids and your kid is getting a game intended for adults.”

Woman: “Well he knows full well not to repeat anything they do in those games; he is a smart boy. Who do you think you are to judge me anyway?”

Me: “Lady… as far as I’m concerned, if my game purchases are your business then your game purchases are my business.”

Woman: “Well I just hope my boy is smart enough to know when it is time to grow up.”

Boy: “Yeah, f*** you!”

(The employees and I burst out laughing as the mother throws the game onto the counter and drags her son out of the shop with him screaming at her that he wants his ‘f****** game.’)

Related:
Grand Theft Innocence, Part 5
Grand Theft Innocence, Part 4
Grand Theft Innocence, Part 3
Grand Theft Innocence, Part 2
Grand Theft Innocence