Stuck In A Vicious Triangle

| Dusseldorf, Germany | Right | November 12, 2013

(I work as IT support for a law firm. Usually I am very understanding when someone asks me a question with an obvious answer, since most lawyers don’t know PCs very well.)

Lawyer: “HELP! My PC is going crazy! Triangles EVERYWHERE!”

Me: “Triangles? What kind of triangles? Do you mean error messages with a warning sign?”

Lawyer: “No, triangles! And a lot of them! I can’t finish my email. Please help me!”

Me: “One moment please, I will connect to your PC to see what’s going on.”

(I start the software and connect to his PC, and see Outlook doing ‘^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^’ without pause.)

Me: “Mr. [Name], is it possible that something is lying on the keyboard?”

Lawyer: *silence*

Me: “Maybe on the upper left corner?”

(At this moment, the ‘triangles’ stop.)

Lawyer: “I guess it wasn’t a good idea to place the book on the keyboard. Please wait a second.”

(He deletes the symbols and tries to write a normal sentence. Without the book pressing a different button, it obviously works.)

Lawyer: “I think I could have figured that out myself. Usually I’m very good with the computer. Thank you. Bye.”

(The lawyer hangs up and my coworker turns to me.)

Coworker: “Hey, Mr. [Name] again? How many times did he call us this week?”

Me: “I had him eight times on the line. I don’t know about the others.”

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A Walk-In That Runs Out

| NV, USA | Right | November 12, 2013

(I work as a secretary in my husband’s practice. We don’t take walk-ins, and it’s clearly stated on the front door, but people still try to see him without an appointment. One day, someone comes in while my husband is out having lunch.)

Walk-In: “Hi, can I see Dr. [Name]?”

(I already suspect something, since my husband would never schedule appointments during his lunch break.)

Me: “What time is your appointment?”

Walk-In: “I don’t have one.”

Me: “I’m sorry; we’re by appointment only.”

Walk-In: “That’s okay; I’m his brother. He’s expecting me.”

Me: “Really? He didn’t tell me anything of the sort.”

Walk-In: “Well, you’re just a silly secretary. You don’t need to know that sort of thing. Can I go see him now?”

Me: “You said you’re his brother?”

Walk-In: “Yes!”

Me: “Well, that’s funny. You don’t look the least bit like him.”

Walk-In: “Everyone says that.”

Me: “Really?”

Walk-In: “Look, b****, I don’t have time for this. Just—”

(At this point, my husband has returned from lunch and has just heard the walk-in’s slur.)

My Husband: “Excuse me! Don’t speak to her that way.”

(The walk-in turns around and looks my husband square in the face.)

Walk-In: “Hey, mind your own business, moron. This doesn’t concern you, so butt out.”

Me: “Actually, it does concern him. That’s the doctor.”

(The walk-in goes white in the face. My husband crosses his arms.)

My Husband: “And moreover, that’s my wife you’ve just insulted.”

Me: *sweetly* “How did you say you were related, again?”

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Putting Your Son Into A Sweet Disposition

| Right | November 12, 2013

God Give Me The Patience

| Right | November 11, 2013

1331273607307_7711302

How About Naw!

| Right | November 11, 2013

3sg8dk

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