The Liquidation Of Our Education

| Cedar Rapids, IA, USA | Extra Stupid

(I am a cashier at a well-known home improvement store. I’m working the closing shift in our garden register during summer, and am the only register open. We have a wide range of displays of water fountains up for customers to see them working, to decide if they want to buy one for their yard. A customer walks in and stands in front of fountains for several minutes looking at them before coming over to me.)

Customer: “Hey, I’m trying to get a fountain for my yard, and I had a quick question. Do you know much about them?”

Me: “Well, I’ve only been trained as a cashier but I’ll answer what I can.”

Customer: “Great! I just wanted to know, is the water included?”

(I can’t believe the customer is asking this question, so I joke with him.)

Me: “No, sir. You buy the water separate.”

Customer: “Oh, how much is it?”

Me: “Do you have a sink at home?”

Customer: “Yes. Why?”

Me: “Then the water is free.”

(The customer looks confused until he suddenly realizes what he’s asked.)

Customer: “Oh!”

Not All Knights Are In Shining Armor

| Minneapolis, MN, USA | Awesome Customers, Top, Wild & Unruly

(Two of my children suffer from a rare, genetic bone disease and they both have recently had major surgery. My 10 year old had his hip rebuilt and is using a wheelchair, while my 13 year old had a tumor taken out of his ankle and is using a walker. The 10 year old also uses a walker to move from his chair to the car. I am parked in a handicapped space, and am trying to get them loaded into the car. There are 6 open handicap spaces, but this elderly man decides he needs the space directly next to my driver’s side.)

Elderly Man: *honking horn* “Get out of the way!”

Me: “I need to get the kids loaded. I’ll be out of the way shortly.”

Elderly Man: *honking even louder, scaring my 10 year old* “Get out of the way, lady! You don’t even need this spot.”

Me: “Sir, my two disabled children do need this spot, but there are several other open spots if you’re in a hurry.”

(By this time, I have my wheelchair bound child in the car. I set his walker aside to push the chair to the back of my car and retrieve my older child’s walker from the other side of the car. Unfortunately, I am not fast enough. The elderly man honks again, then bullies his way into the spot and DRIVES OVER the walker. I am nearly in tears, and have just put my head down trying to get the wheelchair folded up and put in the trunk of my car. The elderly man gets out of his car while I have the chair half way from the ground to the trunk.)

Elderly Man: “You’re very rude! You should be ashamed of yourself! You shouldn’t even be using this spot. It’s obvious you don’t need it!”

Me: *literally slack-jawed* “I’m sorry you feel that way…”

(As the elderly man leaves, two young men who look like thugs approach me.)

Young Men: “We’ve seen everything and feel really bad for you. Can we help you get the wheelchair and walkers into your car?”

Me: *crying and trembling* “Yes…”

(Not only do the young men get the medical equipment in my car, but they get my 10 year old laughing again with their non-stop jokes. After they finish helping me…)

Me: “Thank you! Can I do anything to repay your kindness?”

Young Men: *wave me off* “We’re just doing what decent people would do. Have a pleasant day!”

(I found out later that they’d noted the elderly man’s tag number and had gone inside to report the incident to the manager. The police were called and the elderly man was held responsible for the damage to the walker.)

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Weekly Roundup: Heartwarming Stories

Not Always Right | Awesome Customers, Roundups

Heartwarming Stories! We feature a lot of stories about bad customers, but these amazing customers will restore your faith in humanity!

  1. No Pranks, Just Thanks (12,785 thumbs up)
    A librarian overhears an uplifting conversation between an autistic child and an extremely caring caretaker!
  2. BOGO: Buy One Give One (4,567 thumbs up)
    An employee gets an unexpected surprise from a BOGO deal and a generous customer.
  3. How To Make An Employee’s Day (1,687 thumbs up)
    A call center worker reveals just how little it takes to make her day!
  4. We Love To See You Smile (2,564 thumbs up)
    An older customer “draws” a smile out of a weary grocery store clerk.
  5. Alls Well That Bookends Well (3,945 thumbs up)
    Two former teenage thieves set things right for a bookstore while setting a good example for their child!

PS #1: check out our new Extras section, with pictures, videos, and news galore!

PS #2: Read more roundups here!

Put A Cork In It

| Newcastle, England, UK | Uncategorized

(A customer has just ordered a large glass of wine. She returns to me at the bar having drunk a good two-thirds of the glass.)

Me: “Hello, madam, is there a problem?”

Customer: “This wine is corked.”

Me: “Excuse me, madam?”

Customer: *points to glass* “This wine is corked. See?”

(I look at the glass and there is a small white object in her drink. I take the glass from her and see that its actually a piece of beer mat.)

Me: “I’m sorry, madam, but this wine isn’t corked. ‘Corking’ is a term used when the structure of the cork, on a molecular level, has allowed oxygen into the wine bottle before it has been opened and turned it sour or unpleasant. This glass has just got a piece of cork in it. In all honesty, madam, that just looks like a small piece of beer mat, not cork. Are you wanting to make a complaint?”

Customer: “That’s what I meant. The wine is a bit sour. It’s not very nice. It must have gone off, like you said, because the cork has let some air into it.”

Me: “Would you like to point out which wine you purchased madam?”

Customer: *points to bottle* “That one.”

Me: “Are you sure, madam?”

Customer: “Yes.”

Me: “That brand of wine is a screw-top, madam.”

(The customer just stands there for a few seconds, then turns around and returns to her table. Five minutes later, her and her partner leave.)

Casting An Extra Super Duper Ginormously Wide Net, Part 2

| Toronto, Canada | Crazy Requests, School

Me: “Thank you for calling [college]. How can I direct your call?”

Caller: “Hi, I’m looking for a student.”

Me: “Certainly. Do you have the student’s name?”

Caller: “I met them at an event at our church and wanted to talk to them about what they’re studying.”

Me: “That seems quite reasonable. If you give me their name, I can either route your call to their dorm room, or leave them a message in their student mailbox.”

Caller: “Well, I didn’t catch their name. Are there a lot of students there? Could I describe them to you?”

Me: “We have about 1400 students, but I do know most of them in dorm, so we can give it a try.”

Caller: “Okay. They’re Asian.”

Me: “Sorry, ma’am, but roughly half of our student population is of Chinese descent. I’m afraid that doesn’t really narrow it down much.”

Caller: “Oh. They’re male?”

Me: “Sorry, that’s still a large percentage of our student body.”

Caller: “They’re studying the Bible.”

Me: “This is a Bible college, so I’m afraid that doesn’t narrow it down at all.”

Caller: “Is there a way that you could just announce over a speaker or something, that someone is looking to speak with a student that was at [church name] this past Sunday?”

Me: “No, ma’am, I’m sorry. I can’t interrupt classes to do that.”

Caller: “Oh, okay.” *click*

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Casting An Extra Super Duper Ginormously Wide Net

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