Aggress Unknown

| Arizona, USA | Bizarre

(I work in a well-known retail store chain. Since we are a smaller sized store, however, we can submit orders for products we offer from our company, but do not carry in store.)

Me: “I’m afraid we don’t have that item in store, but I can order it for you. Would you like it sent directly to your house?”

Customer:  “Alright, that sounds fine.”

(I proceed to process his order, then get to where I need to enter the customer’s shipping information.)

Me: “Alright, and the address for the shipping information?”

Customer: “NO.”

Me: *confused* “Um…I’m sorry?”

Customer: “I said ‘no!’ You should have a better way to do this. This is ridiculous. I’m not giving you my address!”

Me: “Sir, you do understand that if we are to ship to your home, we need to know where to ship the item to.”

Customer: “I’m not giving you my address!”

Me: *trying another approach* “I did say that we can ship it to your home, but that means we can’t do that if we don’t have an address to ship it to.”

Customer: “I don’t care! I’m not giving you my address. I can’t believe how poorly this store handles this kind of stuff! You know how many drug addicts are out there?!”

Me: “I’m…sorry?”

Customer: “Yeah, they’re all hopped up on coke and meth. A buddy of mine, a war vet, was just hit with a crowbar because one of these guys went to go break the window open, but it was already open, and threw the crowbar into him! Cut him up, he’s got a scar and had to get stitches! How dare you ask for my address? You’ll just steal my identity and rob my house!”

Me: *speechless*

Misery Demands Company, Part 2

| Australia | Crazy Requests

(I’m a little hyperactive and ditzy, but mostly it comes off as being friendly, or so I think, until this customer comes up to me.)

Customer: “Miss, exactly what kind of drugs are you on?”

Me: “None at all, I assure you.”

Customer: “Bulls***! You can’t just be that happy!”

Me: *completely bewildered* “I’m sorry?”

Customer: “That’s more like it!” *picks up his things and leaves*

Related:
Misery Demands Company

Self Disservice

| Arizona, USA | Extra Stupid, Top

(I am a customer heading for the bathroom at a store. A woman storms out of the lady’s room. It looks like she’s trying hard to keep her hands in the air and not touch anything as she marches up to an employee.)

Customer: “Do you know how long I’ve been waiting in there!? Why hasn’t anyone come in?”

Employee: “I’m sorry?”

Customer: “The sign in there says ‘Employees must wash hands’! I’ve been waiting in there for fifteen minutes for someone to wash my hands!”

Less Than Or Equal To Dumb

| Portland, OR, USA | Hotels & Lodging, Math & Science

Guest: “We have a party of six. Will that fit in your hotel’s van?”

Me: “Well, our hotel van has room for eleven.”

Guest: *blank stare*

Me: “So, your party of six will fit.”

Guest: “Oh! Good.”

The Golden Rude

| Summerville, SC, USA | Food & Drink, Top

(I am working at the drive-thru at our coffee shop.)

Me: “Thank you for choosing [coffee shop]. This is [name]. How may I help you?”

Customer: *complete silence*

(I can see his car in our camera and he’s not talking.)

Me: “Did you have any questions or anything?”

Customer: “Well, there you are! What kind of smoothies do you have?”

Me: “We have strawberry banana, orange mango banana, and chocolate banana.”

Customer: “I want a strawberry one.”

Me: “Okay, that will be—”

Customer: *drives away from the speaker before I can finish*

(The customer in front of this customer in the drive-thru line has an issue with her order, so we have to wait until it is ready. During this time I make small talk with the customer as we are trained to do. After handing the customer her beverage, the next car pulls up.)

Me: “That will be [price]. Your smoothie is on its way!”

Customer: “I have a concern. You just wasted 5 minutes of my time having a conversation with that other customer. If I had honked my horn, you would have called me rude, but don’t you think it is rude to have personal conversations on my time? I just can’t believe you would do things like that. My time is valuable and I don’t like my time to be wasted!”

Me: “Well, they had an issue with their order and we had to wait. I thought it would be rude to ask her to stop talking to me. I will go check on your smoothie.”

(I get the smoothie and come back to the window.)

Me: “All right, there you go!”

(I am holding the smoothie out toward the customer. He spends a good two to three minutes talking on the phone while I wait.)

Customer: *turns and finally sees me* “Well, finally, what took so long?”

Me: “I’ve been standing here for two minutes.”

Customer: “Well, I was on the phone. Why didn’t you say something?”

Me: “I didn’t want to be rude.”

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