(I’m in the middle of sharing interesting facts about Seattle to a group of 20. Unfortunately, one tourist has been talking on the phone the entire time, making it hard for others to hear me.)
Me: “Now, back when the Space Needle was built, it was the tallest building west of the Mississippi River and it—”
Tourist: “Wait, which of these rivers is the Mississippi?”
Me: “Well, that’s the Puget sound to your right. The two other large bodies of water you can see are Lake Union and Lake Washington—”
Tourist: “So, where’s the river?”
Me: “You mean the Mississippi River?”
Customer: “Well, duh.”
Me: “I guess about 1600 miles east of here.”
Customer: “So, you can’t see it, then?”
Me: “Not from here, no.”
Hey everyone! Today, we’re pleased to introduce
Not Always Right Extras, a brand-new category where we’ll be featuring funny & stupid customer-related pictures, videos, and news from around the web.
As excited as we are about Extras, we realize it’s not for everyone; many of you prefer to read Not Always Right’s stories as you always have, without interruption.
Therefore, Extras will never show on the main blog, and will only be visible here.
Either way, we hope you’ll visit Extras today and give it a try!
PS – Got an Extra of your own? Suggest one here!
Introducing Weekend Roundups: each week, we’ll be featuring some of our favorite stories from the Not Always Right archives.
Kids Say The Awesomest Things! This week, we share five stories that show that kids are not only our best customers, but can be an employee’s best friend!
- Ah, Children:
A misbehaving customer gets put in the time-out corner…by a toddler.
- They Swim Where The Sun Doesn’t Shine:
When Blade meets The Little Mermaid, awesome ensues.
- Making A Hug(e) Difference:
Every store needs a kid like this…seriously, can Not Always Right adopt this boy?
- Vocabulary, Meet Veracity:
Proof that kids hear everything parents say.
- They Grow Up Too Fast:
When the rubber hits the road, Ultimate Driving Machines come in all sizes.
(A passenger hails my taxi outside a bar.)
Me: “Good evening, sir. Where would you like to go?”
Passenger: “Take me to [other bar, about a $10 fare], and make sure you go the shortest way! Don’t be taking the long way around to get more money!”
Me: “Of course, I was going to go my usual way, which is the shortest and cheapest. Is that okay?”
Passenger: “No! That’s the long way! Take me this way.”
(The passenger proceeds to guide me on an angled course that adds at least 40% to the trip.)
Passenger: “Now, that’s the way you go! I’ve got you taxi drivers all figured out. You always try to go that other way, but mine is better!”
(An elderly man dressed like a hippie is looking through our PS2 section.)
Customer: “Now, this game has the right idea.” *gestures to a copy of ‘Destroy All Humans’* “Humanity is what’s killing mother Earth. The world would be so much better if we just got rid of them all.”
Me: “Um, sir, do you really think a race whose primary weapon is an anal probe gun would really do any better?”
Customer: *thinks it over* “No, I suppose you’re right.” *sadly puts the game back and walks away*