Hellish Customers

| ON, Canada | Bad Behavior, Family & Kids, Religion

(While doing theater checks, I am informed that we have some skateboarders using our building’s parking lot and curbs as their own personal skate-park. I am sent to ask them to leave.)

Me: “Hey guys, you can’t skateboard here.”

Skateboarder #1: “Well, where can we go then?”

Me: “I know of a skate-park 20 minutes walk from here at [local park].”

Skateboarder #2: “Can we do a few more tricks here before we go?”

Me: “Sorry, no.”

(The three skateboarders turn to leave when the third, who has remained quiet the whole time, turns to me.)

Skateboarder #3: “I WORSHIP LUFFASIR SIX SIX SIX! What do you say to that!?”

Me: “Luffasir? It’s Lucifer, and I don’t need any more morons worshiping me. Now get the h*** out of here.”

(Skateboarder #3 turns red and quickly walks away followed by his buddies, who could not stop laughing.)

Top 5 Not Always Right Stories Of October 2013

Not Always Right | Roundups

October 2013 Top Story Roundup: Here are Not Always Right’s top-rated stories for the month of October!

  1. Stress About The Dress (4,138 thumbs up)
  2. Finally Singing To The Same Tune (3,956 thumbs up)
  3. He’s The Best Actor Of The Bunch (3,251 thumbs up)
  4. Putting Your Son Into A Sweet Disposition (2,794 thumbs up)
  5. The Grandmother Of All Threats (2,711 thumbs up)

PS #1: check out our new Extras section, with pictures, videos, and news!

PS #2: Read more roundups here!

A Price For The Devil To Pay

| RI, USA | Crazy Requests, Religion

Customer: “Excuse me, miss; could you help me?”

Me: “Sure, what do you need?”

Customer: “Could you change the price on this syrup? The unit price is $6.66, and I don’t want to buy the devil’s syrup.”

Me: “I don’t think we can change the price at the store level. And I’m not sure that’s a valid reason to change a price.”

Customer: “It doesn’t have to be much. Even just a penny would be fine. Could you ask your manager?”

Me: “Ma’am, I really don’t think we can change the price on a national brand item. We have other kinds of syrup that are just as good if the unit price of that brand bothers you.”

Customer: “No! I want that brand! I only eat that brand! And I want you to lower the price of that brand!”

Me: “Ma’am, I’m afraid I can’t do that.”

Customer: “I’m never shopping at this devilish place again! Everyone who works here is going to go straight to Hell for associating with the devil!”

Me: “Have a nice day, ma’am.”